Am I not Man Enough...
Yesterday I along with a friend went to a bar. He had come with two of his girl friends. After 3 – 4 beers he started talking in their national language to one of the girls and they started behaving awkwardly. Fortunately I understood what was happening as the other girl started holding my hand and my thighs etc etc.
At this point I did talk with my friend about his plans and he was taking one of them to his place and wanted me to accompany him to his place with the other girl.
I do not know what was the deal, I mean whether I needed to pay or was everything happening on a spur of the moment. In any case I am not interested in any of such things and had to actually excuse all three and my friend in particular. All along when this female was trying to come close to me and I would not make her comfortable, I could see people on other tables looking at me like I was not acting and behaving properly. I felt ashamed of even looking into my friend’s eyes. I had to leave them and went home alone. While walking from the table to the door I felt as if all the people in that bar were looking and laughing at me.
I know I should not betray my wife and am holding my promise but what to do if this situation arises ever again????????
My questions are;
1. What does a person do in such situations?
2. Why do people laugh at a men when he acts like this?
3. Is this not like acting as a man OR am I not man enough to accept advances of any woman for physical intimacy (I am not gay but love my wife).
I am confused.
Well in this case, all I can say is that I am sure not ALL me would be noticing you (I am sure they have their own drinks/dates/partners/pool tables/football games to keep them busy). A couple of them, sure its a possibility they may be eyeing whats happening. But then who cares. And if they happen to be laughing, its just because its human nature! Let them have their laugh, but I for one wouldn't take it so personally.
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it"
I will get in touch with my so called friend and pass the contact # to you.
Venky: It was only an experience and my question was more in general than what happened to me. What I am trying to figure is when we all know what is wrong and right.. still some or most of the people even after knowing it, would go for it and also tease others who do not. I think I have made my point more clear now.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
all i have to say is pass her number here
into my office is coming one supplier with a voluptous lady having white white skin and less less clothes ------ lady is to be know nothing and only to be trying to influence my decision. i am to be much much tempted to see her but try talk only supplier. later i am to smile also for this beauty lady --- 2 times only --- otherwise she is to think i am gay. and may be supplier also think same to same ---- and so i smile to lady also.
Didnt really understand the point of this thread despite the repeated attempts of the "poster".
Anyway, if you went home (or to a hotel) with this woman to be man enough, you will keep trying all your life trying to be man enough to shrug it off from your conscience.
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it"
If that guy knew you were married???
He is a real azz...
And not a friend...
You can't teach experience...
whats there more to lose than self respect?
do it right - the first time!
Yes you had ask what you had to, but doesn't deny the fact that you waited the predominance to stablish before saying you are proud of your action, after 20 plus post to be exact. This was even underscored by your last paragraph in your opening post The point is, what if the predominance is the otherwise? You might be changing your coat...
Someone is being pretentious......
I think you have not read the post properly. I have asked what I had to.
2. Go through all my posts and the reply to your other doubt will also be cleared.
I will repeat... I AM PROUD OF WHAT I DID.
I think by community we mean to share our incidents with others.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
And btw, with regards to your question "Am I not Man Enough?" my answer would be YES as in Y-E-S, yes.
Because you are not firm with your action, it takes other people's views before you stand firm with your action
Rayyz- Exactly same here:)
I quote "I know I should not betray my wife and am holding my promise BUT [emphasis added] what to do if this situation arises ever again????????" Seems you care more in what other people say....
This shows that you are not firm with your action. As demonstrated by your opening post, nowhere did you mentioned that you are proud of your action, you waited for this community to comment and see what would be the majority and dwell into it. What if the most comments is otherwise??? You would have been saying, "Yeah... it's a waste, I should have stayed".
I believe, someone is in denial............
You did the right thing man and I'm really proud of you. I would hate my wife or my girl friend if i find out that she was cheating on me. Giving her all of my love and attention and the end that is the end? If I want her to behave the same way it won't be unfair if i will do these things and ask her later if she did it, why?
I'm really happy for you and just don the right things and don't care about the look of the people as what you did is not wrong.
------------------------------------
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. (Gautama Buddha)
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
loooooooooooooool .. hahahahaha .. what about the biscuits ?? wut u gonna do with that ?? hahahaa
================================================
My Music: http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist
My Photographing: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ram8982/
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
Napoleon Bonapart
Someone asked me yesterday why did i go to bar at all. My reply was to have couple of glasses of milk...... LOL.
I think now I need to release that.... hehehehehehehehehe
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
Where to pour?? ofcourse that will be ur lost kids in toilets .. hahahaha
What ?? i don't think u need to ask that question .. loooool
================================================
My Music: http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist
My Photographing: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ram8982/
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
Napoleon Bonapart
I think if you are single... only keep a helmet on your person always.. Who knows when would you need one.
And be SAFE
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
What you did is noble, that just prove how good a person you are and that you really love your wife.
But if you're single, that's a different story... :D
Good morning to you.
Hahahahahahahaha..... Where do I pour and what do I pour???
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
I am not confused at all but at the same time I want to understand when we know it is wrong still we laugh at other men when he does not encourage flirtation form a woman. He is considered a sissy etc etc. Do you agree with this ??
You still think I am confused. that is your imagination and I have absolutely no interest in changing your thinking.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
"just make fun of the chicks on the table and how it would take them a lot of begging 2 get a piece of u , and take the whole excitment home and ehmmmmmm, pour it onto ur wife:) hehe"
Very well said .. that was the best .. but the prob. is his wife is not with him .. so he might pour that somewhere else ..
================================================
My Music: http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist
My Photographing: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ram8982/
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
Napoleon Bonapart
What would Vegas do...:)
You can't teach experience...
you did what you did...but why are you questioning your action? why have you doubted your action? and you are CONFUSED???
Certainly, you have some regrets for not going with the flow as betrayed by your statement, I quote,...."but what to do if this situation arises ever again????????", and further attested by confessing that you are confused.
Someone's getting the praises that they don't deserve....
dude,
the only thing that is really gay here is how u r handeling the whole thing:)
ur sexual conduct is strictlly urs ( and i approve ur stance and salute u for it )...
but to take it out on a forum pissing and moaning about it like that!!!
toughen up dude..!!!
:)
just make fun of the chicks on the table and how it would take them a lot of begging 2 get a piece of u , and take the whole excitment home and ehmmmmmm, pour it onto ur wife:) hehe
cheers
http://hasous.spaces.live.com
"missiles, warships and nuclear weapons cannot establish security. Instead they destroy what peace and security build." Anwar Sadat
I realy need to sort out the friend issue here and I am already on the job. have started calling him character in QL and would be more cautious with whom I go in the evenings.
I agree with you for the last laugh.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
Call you for help or to the rescue? LOL
-----------------------------------------
E4U & RNH Events Present
Golmaal Pyaar Ka - Unlimited Edition of Laughter
on 22nd November 2007
-----------------------------------------
Win tickets at our website:
http://www.e4u.name.qa/main.htm
LOL.. PM me ur cell#.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
Skdak take care man and dont think about such stuff too much
We all have a voice within us which tells us whats right
As long as u can hear it ur okay - but dont let it die
That's just the way it is
Some things will never change - Bruce Hornsby
no worries mate next time call me for help :D
[img_assist|nid=21285|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]
I think some members are taking this thread to unwanted territories.
I just asked or wanted to know and understand something.. and that is all i wanted to do.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
Skdkak, you will find a lot of ladies eyeing you if you go to pubs alone. (Well, most of the pubs.) Infact, they will keep pestering you and keep offering themselves. I can understand, men these days get conscious, wondering if they will be percieved as gay when they ignore advances by a lady. In such a scenario, I suggest, a smile on your face while tackling the situation does the trick.
i personaly feel that this situation made u feel good
This usually happens to women and when i happens to us men especially us married men we feel as if we are still good looking to women
now tell me seriously didnt u feel like that just a little bit
hey hey hey what's with elbow frisking in here?...c'mon we got a nice day...chill..:)
tcom? have you taken your pill this morning?...want some apple i can send one for you now..:D
Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.
u know wut?? if that situation made u upset u shud know that posting this on QL gonna drive u mad .. if i were u i wouldn't have tried to post on QL
================================================
My Music: http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist
My Photographing: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ram8982/
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
Napoleon Bonapart
I am asking for
""""My questions are;
1. What does a person do in such situations?
2. Why do people laugh at a men when he acts like this?
3. Is this not like acting as a man OR am I not man enough to accept advances of any woman for physical intimacy (I am not gay but love my wife)."""
and not any positive and negative comments. But if you pinpoint me in particular. I do have the right to reply.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
for or against i have a right to air my views ... am wondering now as to why you want only positive replies
Looks like my initial doubts were true
I would rather have one rose and a kind word from a friend while I'm here
Than a whole truck load when I'm gone
I am not here to prove anything. Just read the post and reply if you have any comments. You may even consider this whole thing is made up. You can keep ur imagination.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
My wife knows this thing before you guys know it. She has not stopped me from going to a bar with a female. Grow up man. A man and a girl together is not always fishy..
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
You said ""What a waste of an opportunity!!!""
then you said "" rayyz said Skdkak ...
What were you doing with two single women and a guy""
I am sure of not wasting any opportunity. I have and will waste such opportunities any number of times in future too.
What was i doing in Bar - DUDE.. I WAS THERE FOR FEW GLASSES OF MILK AND BISCUITS and when did i say going to a bar with a girl is SIN.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
so far so good keeping myself busy how u been
I would rather have one rose and a kind word from a friend while I'm here
Than a whole truck load when I'm gone
You are married and you went out with your frend together with a group of girls that apparently you dont know. I mean there is nothing wrong in doing that, but atleast you must be aware of the place that you are going at and the people you are going with. At the time you went out with them, Im sure that you already have a hint on what they are really up to..... Here are my personal point of view to your questions....
1. What does a person do in such situations?
- The answer to this question will depend on the duration of your marriage relationship with your wife. Well, if you and your wife are newly wed... well, your initial action is normal, to walk away or say no to such temptation. If you are married for, lets say more than 5 years.... probably you might let the girl go over you and brought her somewhere else and do things that a man must to when they a girl do the first move.
2. Why do people laugh at a men when he acts like this?
- Its a bar, people are having a great time and always laugh. Probably, its only you who think that they were laughing at you. Or, if they are really laughing at you maybe you were over reacting and became to obvious when the girl tried to do a move on you.
3. Is this not like acting as a man OR am I not man enough to accept advances of any woman for physical intimacy (I am not gay but love my wife).
- If you are really confident about your true feelings towards your wife, or if you are really confident about your sexuality.... There is no need for you to be worried on what people will say about you. Whats important is you, your family and your dignity.
Long time no see mate........How have u been?
The art of being wise is to know what to overlook.
magandah hapon
I would rather have one rose and a kind word from a friend while I'm here
Than a whole truck load when I'm gone
this sounds exactly like the the girl having sunbath in the parking area of lulu
I would rather have one rose and a kind word from a friend while I'm here
Than a whole truck load when I'm gone
I agree with nemo......what is the logic behind ur post? What if ur wife or her friend was able to see u with the girl making advances. Is ir worth it. If the logic is improve ur image then u have to wait till tomorrow (weather u r invited for the QL weekend beach party or not)
The art of being wise is to know what to overlook.
"Yesterday I along with a friend went to a bar. He had come with two of his girl friends"
it means that he was expecting his friend only .. but the friend came with two of HIS girl friends ...
and no prob. if u r married and go out with a friend in a bar .. it doesn't mean that u went fishing .. ;)
stay safe .. how r u dude?? and how is everything?
================================================
My Music: http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist
My Photographing: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ram8982/
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
Napoleon Bonapart
What were you doing with two single women and a guy in the bar in the first place? Where was your wife all this while?
-----------------------------------------
E4U & RNH Events Present
Golmaal Pyaar Ka - Unlimited Edition of Laughter
on 22nd November 2007
-----------------------------------------
Win tickets at our website:
http://www.e4u.name.qa/main.htm
from morning i could not enter any input now i can thats good
magandang hapon
I would rather have one rose and a kind word from a friend while I'm here
Than a whole truck load when I'm gone
who's fishy here?maybe he/she had fish for lunch..waaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!![img_assist|nid=48103|title=**** ****|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=98|height=98]
You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.
Albert Camus
I think it is very admirable of you to resist temptation. lol
u r most welcome
================================================
My Music: http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist
My Photographing: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ram8982/
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
Napoleon Bonapart
I find something fishy
I would rather have one rose and a kind word from a friend while I'm here
Than a whole truck load when I'm gone
A "MAN" is not someone who cheats on his wife....that's just warped.
Love is so hard to find as it is, if you've found it with your wife why on earth would you geopardize it for a few seconds of pleasure?
You SHOULD feel proud, you did the right thing...bravo.
Stay safe all.
Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?
Thank you so much!!
[img_assist|nid=48103|title=**** ****|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=98|height=98]
You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.
Albert Camus
but please keep this needle away from my "@ ss" .. lol ..
I like ur signature .. it's so true
================================================
My Music: http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist
My Photographing: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ram8982/
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
Napoleon Bonapart
What a waste of an opportunity!!! :(
-----------------------------------------
E4U & RNH Events Present
Golmaal Pyaar Ka - Unlimited Edition of Laughter
on 22nd November 2007
-----------------------------------------
Win tickets at our website:
http://www.e4u.name.qa/main.htm
In the future, if this happens again, avoid it, or atleast bring the wife along. People talk, that's normal, what matters is you doing the right thing.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
./`I don't wanna waste another day-Keepin it inside, it's killing me./`
super wow!!!
[img_assist|nid=48103|title=**** ****|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=98|height=98]
You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.
Albert Camus
swissgirl: "world would looks a little bit better." little bit .. just little .. i think much more better ..
buttercupryle: I have been in such situation many times .. and i need to learn how to go out without embarrassing my self ..
so the best thing is to embarrass the other side .. in a polite way or sometimes one should be rude ..
================================================
My Music: http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist
My Photographing: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ram8982/
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
Napoleon Bonapart
another thing skdk, always trust your instincts...:)
Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.
wuill be back in sharp 45 min.
Chau.. till then
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
thanks for the wish.
Ram: I agree with you. World would be a better place to live if we all men behave.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
I have no clue why ur asking these questions. U should be sure of who u are and ur love and loyalty for wife. Who cares what people think ? They don't know u.
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong :P - Garfield
Thanks for the comments. I am feeling proud of what ever I did yesterday and will keep it up always.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
Skdak
What the hell is the problem
U did what u did because u knew already that it was the right thing to do
I dont see any confusion arising
I like your answers..
[img_assist|nid=48103|title=**** ****|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=98|height=98]
You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.
Albert Camus
Hi Buddy,how are you?
I agree in this point,if all men are like that the world would looks a little bit better.
:-D
*Create your own destiny,fighting against your dark sides,raise your
spirituality.Every day is a new day.A new life.
Keep the faith!*
skdkak...your friend may have been rolling the camera on to blackmail you. Unfortunately, his plan did not succeed LOL. Kidding aside, congratulations on your nth anniversary. Tell your friend, better luck next time :P.
No comments
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
congrats again to your anniversary and your wife can be proud of you.
lucky her.
:-D
*Create your own destiny,fighting against your dark sides,raise your
spirituality.Every day is a new day.A new life.
Keep the faith!*
Chill.
You have understood my post absolutely in wrong sense. What I said... boys always propose and ask for a date etc etc to girls and it is the girls that have to handle all your proposals since your high school thing. Plz think in these lines...
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
Why u get nervous?? simply u can tell her "Sorry u r not my type" OR "I'm afraoid my wife won't be happy if i did this"
u can say a lot "R u drunk, if so i'm not"
if u want to be little rude, look to her seriously and say "Put ur hands off me" and take her hands and throw them away ..
UNLESS she succeeded to turn u on or she was to hot to be refused
simply say "I need to go now, may be later" and walk away ..
Trust in ur self and have some self confidence and don't care about wut other says if u know that u r doing the right thing ..
I'm 25 yrs old and i'm still virgin ... I used to do so when friends like urs try to envolve me into such things .. even if they laugh at me i never cared cuz i know that i'm doing the right thing .. even if they said i'm gay or not man enough or don't have a ..... or not able to dit .. u know wut guys says .. but i threw all this behind my back and go away ...
I respect u for caring about ur wife .. and for ur love to her .. if all men were like u the whole world would have been in better situation ..
================================================
My Music: http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist
My Photographing: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ram8982/
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
Napoleon Bonapart
This character friend of mine is also married but she is not here.
My wife is also not here (joining me soon)... might be he thought i will go with the flow of drinks and his plans..
I forgot to tell you guys.. Today is my wedding anniversary and this character might have planned accordingly.
I mis my wify and curse my PRO. he had promised me of my family in Doha by 31st Oct.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
thanks for reminding that there are still faithful guys in the world… lol…(hey, now… don’t kill me, guys!!!)
why skdk, i admire how you handled that situation....for not taking advantage of it....you didnt make less of a man by declining/avoiding things to happen...good thing that you are using your mind over anything else...
and btw, what you just showed is a normal behaviour/attitude of being loyal to your wife...:)
Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.
A real man/woman is one who is able resist temptations...you are a loyal and loving husband. What you did is 100% right. May be some people may disagree. Avoid such situations in future....make yourself clear to your so called friend.
are you accusing me or the girls in general? I assure you that I'm not like that.
[img_assist|nid=48103|title=**** ****|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=98|height=98]
You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.
Albert Camus
skdkak - this is the last time you and I go out together
Consider yourself an ex friend....
(Just a joke)
- I took the blue pill and found myself alive in Qatar - wish I had taken the red and stayed in Europe
why did u say "am i not a man" do u have some doubt on ur self........
LOL. I realy laughed at the penis part.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
Thatz exactly I did. I walked away leaving him alone.
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
why you feel ashamed???you did the right thing and i cant understand your friend that he brought you in this situation because i think he knowes you are not single and he should tell that clearly to that woman and tell her to stop that game.
well done man,congrats.
:-D
*Create your own destiny,fighting against your dark sides,raise your
spirituality.Every day is a new day.A new life.
Keep the faith!*
Thanks. But it is really not possible to say NO to girls. You have habbit of doing it to boys.
Thanks any way
..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..
I will really admire you..it doesn't mean you are a gay..c'mon![img_assist|nid=48103|title=**** ****|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=98|height=98]
You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.
Albert Camus
Good for you. If anything it shows you're a real man and not just a walking penis.
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
I salute you for that and I admire you as well. Remember Joseph in the bible he ran away when the Pharoah's wife wants to have some fun with him?
It's courageous..
[img_assist|nid=48103|title=**** ****|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=98|height=98]
You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.
Albert Camus
are u serious dude??
how does ur not responding to her advances imply that ur not man enough aka gay!!??
im seriously blown away by u even implying it or questioning wat u had to do
u love ur wife... another woman tries to hit on u... u tell her to piss off.. or if ur the polite kind... u ignore and walk away.. and not care wat ppl think coz ur respecting ur promise to ur wife
and ur friend.. not much of a friend if he's encouraging adultery in any form.. wthr u went home with her.. or simply bringing someone along to hit on a married man..
i suggest u re-evaluate ur friendship with this guy.. and avoid these kinds of awkward social situations since there mite be some temptation of any sort..
so - keep loving ur wife
cut off ur friend - or confront him so that he realizes wat ur boundaries are..
and just stay the way u are.. respect! (u aint gay!!)
'nuff said
"He who reigns within himself and rules passions, desires, and fears is more than a king."