Can MEN and WOMEN be JUST Friends?
Strong friendships between a man and woman are sometimes difficult to understand and accept, though relationships between two women or two men is more readily accepted by our society.
When a man and woman hold hands in public, automatically they are assumed to be lovers. Friends are friends and lovers are lovers. Very few people are physically affectionate with their friends.
People find it difficult to dissociate love from sex. If two people express love and affection for each other it is assumed that they are lovers.
The truth is fairly simple: two people like each other, are comfortable together and a special bond of friendship develops between them.
Sometimes friendship is taken for granted and people are willing to give it up when they fall in love, want to marry or have a long term relationship. Sexual or romantic love is ASSUMED to be better and therefore preferred.
As far as my friendship experiences goes…I have lot many “male Friends” from different cities or countries, from different age groups, married-unmarried-singles and now "gender"...hardly matters to me.
We discuss about our LIFE, LOVE, WORK experiences, go out for dinners, movies, and picnics…if there are any issues at professional and personal fronts, we provide ears to hear each other out and give advises/console each other...
NOTE: DON'T YOU GO "DIRTY-MINDED" HERE...NOT THAT KIND FRIENDSHIP ALL YOU SMART-AZZ'es (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE)will try to INTERJECT IN THIS THREAD....IT WILL ONLY SHOW HOW "MATURE" YOU REALLY.
STICK TO the question: IS IT POSSIBLE TO BE “JUST” FRIENDS WITH PEOPLE OF OPPOSITE GENDER?
omg all this posts in only one day
lol
Isn't it nice when all could share their views about a topic/thread without the hostility???
As long as you know your boundaries.
It is very much possible... :)
As long as we do not have anything sinister at the back of our minds!
" Make new friends but keep the old, One is silver... the other gold. "
in sharing my ideas, thoughts, personal problems etc...
I have male and female friends. Some are so close they are more like family and others are casual friends. The bottom line is the attributes that make a good and loyal friend. That definition is all about the individuals character versus their sex. Good friends do not divulge confidences, know when to tell you what you need to hear and not what you want to hear, take a stand with you without thinking of themselves, and will eat a half a gallon of ice cream with you while you mope even though it is not on their Atkins Diet. :D
~I know nothing!~
Sergeant Schults from Hogan's Heros
yes.
,
Never go younger by a month, a hard bod is no substitute for wisdom.
-Angelica Houston, Material Girls
I'm late for work...
We can talk about our thoughts; our feelings but...
you cannot say the same thing about the person of opposite gender.
You never know what your friend is talking about you in his or her group of friends.
it's friendship between opposite genders...
IF YOU THINK that AZILANA told off britexpat about sharing personal information with friends, yet here she wants to discuss life, love etc...duuhhh???
You share stories but you share IN CONFIDENCE...
IF TELLING a friend that about your PERSONAL/MARRIED ISSUES is comfortable to you BUT YOUR FRIEND telling OTHERS...WHY NOT?
YES WHY NOT?!
"Even if LOVE is full of thorns, embrace it. For in between those thorns there is a ROSE that's worth all the PAIN."
Azilana said "We discuss about our LIFE, LOVE, WORK experiences, go out for dinners, movies, and picnics…if there are any issues at professional and personal fronts, we provide ears to hear each other out and give advises/console each other..."
this is deep friendship.. How many of us can handle our partner doing that ?
A few days ago Azilana told off Britexpat reagrding sharing personal information with friends, yet here she wants to discuss life, love etc..
All very strange
on the maturity of the people involved...
It doesn't happen instantaneously because of OUTSIDE FACTORS such as each other's current partners/spouses/mates.
Sometimes, (bored/narrow-minded)people that sorrounds them can affect friendships too. Coz they are the ones who buzzes (like bees) stupid assumptions whenever they see opposite genders being close friends. You know the type...gossips and rumour-mongers :-)
Yup I have lots of friends of the opposite sex, as does my boyfriend. Doesn't really bother either of us.
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Sorry; Got to disagree. Deep friendship between men and women can happen, but is NOT often tolerated or understood by the partners. Brandylady, I envy you and you, but also think that yours is the exception, rather than the rule..
An ex could be a one of your good friends...but that (again) depends on the person's maturity.
Usually...If the sexual element in a relationship is lost, no friendship is left and the couple moves away from each other in every respect. Instead of seeing sexual relationships as friendships, which include sex, couples often see them as separate from any kind of friendship.
If people could break away from this tradition they could be friends with their lovers and ex-lovers and enjoy close, happy and meaningful relationships.
This would also reflect a certain amount of growth and maturity of the personality.
Thank you Thank you
Azi once again the topic goes in my fav lol :D
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It depend on your maturity, mindset and your need at that particular time...
as Other qualities could be mentioned so that solid friendships can be cultivated. A sense of humor, charity, understanding, compassion is only some of the ingredients that have to be cultivated for a solid friendship with another.
I do not see a reason why frindship can not be between males and females but we need to be clear about a number of things
Maturity of both is a must to keep the relation within the frame of friendship
Clear expectations from both parties, need to be set and boundaries agreed
If the relation was to develop into something else, are they ready for it ...
Culture differences ...
All these factors define the nature of the relationship
In my country they say do not place fire beside petrol and do not expect it to burn ... I have learned that setting the rules can make it happen
.....
for that one britexpat is to put the phone on speaker and let your partner listen too, we have a good trusting relationship and confidence in each others feelings for each other, makes trusting a lot easier xx
the best friends (opposite sex) usually are your friends before you get married, your classmates, childhood friends, etc. But you know who can be a very comfortable friend (which is very seldom to transformed), your old or ex-bf or ex-gf. Those people who you were with before but civilly you parted ways. Only love's lost but the friendship remains. In his/her arms you will most comfortable because you know each other. You won't hesitate to hold hands embrace or even give simple kisses as a gesture of meeting again.
This can only be possible if you are matured enough to realize that not everything in friendship is "sex" (if you are talking about the opposite sex.
"dgoodrebel will always be the rebellious good one"
The one called when "Harry meet Sally", this movie was invented to answer this very question. enough said.
Like Brandylady says.. Its a matter of trust and a test of your own relationship..
Assume that you are on the phone with your friend "giggling and laughing" for a while.. how would your partner take it ?
Surely 2 people of the opposite sex can be JUST friends...
Well I do like having a lot many of them, but will have to wait and see how it would be after marriage, pretty much same I suppose but hey lets wait and see...
Cheers...!!!
I dont want her breaking my legs like Khanan's WIFE...HA HA HA HA HA!!!
but I am the lucky one as hubby respects my friends too and he has female friends, trust is the big thing there but if you don't have that, whats the point :)
Very difficult, especially after you get married or are in a long term relationship with someone. They may not understand the need for a "Platonic" relationship.
the answer is simple yes...and as diamond said...honesty and respect is the key to a successful frndshp b/w opposite genders....
Azzi..long time no see...hope to see you soon...how u doing ???
____________________________________________________
If you look at what you do not have in life;
You don't have anything.
If you look at what you have in life;
You have everything.
in the UK I worked mostly with men and had lots of men friends, find them a lot easier to talk to than women sometimes too.
Yes they can be, like what I am to u.
Like Darude said, "main thing is about being honest and resepct"
"If we learn to look at the situations from the second person's view, things might be a different. Similarly if we stand in other person's shoe, we would be in heaven right now... " - me
Back in my country, coz of the line of work, neighborhood, family ties, and all those stuff that expresses equality and commonality that's why friendship amongst opposite sexes are the norm.
Here in a different country, "friendship" between opposite genders connotes a 'different' meaning. No wonder MOST of the female gender (irregardless of nationalities) sometimes are wary of any offers of friendship that male genders offer.
I'M NOT GENERALIZING...I'm just stating an opinion.
I think they can be friends. My 'best' friends are mostly men.. apart from my little sister.. and my kids..
The territory changes when one of you gets involved with someone else- but it's like Darude says; if you both have respect for each other and to their priorities, it usually comes good.
Friendship after a relationship with a member of the opposite sex can be doable too.. with space. I always feel that if you've shared such a chunk of yourself with someone, they're worth investing patience and time on.
Gosh, that was deep. phewwwwph.
my wooden small cross...
Pleaseeeeeee
4rget the bottle!
TO BE OR NOT TO BE,THATS THE QUESTION!
then have a nice and relaxing sleep and sweet dreams
god bless you always.
muah
my wooden small cross and my FULL bottle!
That's more expressive than a million words
Thank you babe.
kisses and hugs to you also. Good night. Got 4 million things to do tomorrow
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TO BE OR NOT TO BE,THATS THE QUESTION!
i will just hug you.that says more then any word.
you know...
gudnite to u too.. hugs..
miss your presence here
===================================== http://www.qatarliving.com/node/58409
TO BE OR NOT TO BE,THATS THE QUESTION!
sleep well and sweet dreams.
hugs.c ya tomorrow
TO BE OR NOT TO BE,THATS THE QUESTION
god bless you always
thank you so much
missed u too.. me doin gud.. and yeah u r still to give me ur email id.. btw i am really sleepy.. i will cya in the mornin.. till then.. u take care sweetie.. hope u be around.. its nice to have u here..
TO BE OR NOT TO BE,THATS THE QUESTION!
will not stay long,just to check some things.
missed you.
are you ok?
SG39 Good to hear from U.
Motivation is when your dreams put on work clothes.
- Ben Franklin
heyyyy swizz.. u back.. how u doin?
how are you dear?
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TO BE OR NOT TO BE,THATS THE QUESTION!
I know a lot of girls as a friends for long years ,,
Some of them are my best and closest friends,
As long as there is Honesty & Good Will Its Possible but once 1 of them has some other feelings then there is no more FRIENDSHIP.
suit myself what?
suit yourself?
first of all id like to thank you for ur topic
here alot of people when they see man with women
anywhere they look at them in two ways :
1 - married
2 - lovers or sumthing else *******
and thats wrong coz they are friends only !!!
i know alot of girls as a friends for long years ,,
i take them as my best and closest friends
even sometimes i need them more than my other friends
so its clear
my regards
xo
Because friends (technically)love each other, one never attempts to force, coerce or control the other to change for the better.
One friend only informs the other of the way he or she feels. Love will motivate the informed friend to change him or herself for the better.
That's the way I see it...
Lol... Find where the ogres are QT... u sure will find some..
"...You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain’t never seen a donkey fly. Ha, Ha, Ha..." Donkey
Why not? Its possible.. again.. as Kelly says.. based on experience.. i bet lot of u ppl have frenz from the opposite sex..
They are fine to me, but have no respect for others!
I feel that I must try and help change them!
"...You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain’t never seen a donkey fly. Ha, Ha, Ha..." Donkey
I don't mind...coz I know I'm not doing anything "bad".
I learned to just "grin and bear it", so to speak.
Well..at least there's an iota of HONESTY, RESPECT & UNDERSTANDING somehow...or else you won't remain friends with them...right, QT?
Azi, don't worry about what other people think or assume. I'm in a similar situation with all my married friends and girlfriends.
Although I know many without any of these! ...and I'm still friends with them! LOL
How are you doing Azi?
"...You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain’t never seen a donkey fly. Ha, Ha, Ha..." Donkey
the main thing and respect too
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and my vote is based on experience
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as i like them to be comfortable with me. I treat them like an older/younger brother/s and the affection is purely platonic.
It's just some "people" ASSUME too easily...
No problems here. I also have many such friends.
Motivation is when your dreams put on work clothes.
- Ben Franklin
I think so as long as there is honesty between the two frinds. What I mean is as long as no-one is harboring feelings for the other and willing to remain friends in the hope that it will become more one day.
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yes yes azi definately doable..........:O)
life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......
They can be and i have alot of male friend and female friends.
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