Something to Laugh About (i guess...)
Titanic was sinking.
An Englishman asked Santa, "How far is land"?
Santa: 2 KMs.
Englishman jumped into sea.
Englishman: Now, which direction?
Santa: Downwards !
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How did Santa tried to kill a bird??
He took it to the top of a building and dropped it from there to die.
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Santa: I have swallowed a Key.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.
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Santa was drawing money from ATM.
Banta, who was just behind him in the line said:
I've seen ur password. It's ****.
Santa: U r wrong. It's 1394.
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Santa falls in love with a nurse...
After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her: "I luv u sister ."
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Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller?
Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl .
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A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa doesn't turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.
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Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatos 5 days ago, he hasn't came back yet!
Santa: Why don't u cook something else? .
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An Englishman and Santa inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
Santa: Good evening, we open the zip and do!
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Santa opened a petrol pump, but not even one customer went there. You know why?
Because he opened petrol pump on second floor..
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Santa and Banta went for a drive.
Santa: Hey, look out from the window, are the indicators working or not?
Banta puts his head out & says "Yes-No, Yes-No, Yes-No, Yes-No!!!"
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Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying furiously...
Finally, Santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again.
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Why did Santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.
hope you'd all smile at least...
<<rule the world>>
Love is always endless
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still laughing.....
thats a cool one.
*WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU KNEW YOU COULD NOT FAIL?*
http://www.myswitzerland.com/en.cfm/home
I only kill with love
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santa singh and banta singh belong to sikh community and they r very close friends. the main reason of their thick friendship is they always think alike. people laugh at their work and they dont bother. SANTA IS NOT SANTA CLAUS.
it is so unfair of you to talk like this...
sigh,cos i really want to be there right now.
but hmmm...maybe sooner as i tought.
yuppieh!!!!!
*WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU KNEW YOU COULD NOT FAIL?*
http://www.myswitzerland.com/en.cfm/home
So far so good SG how are you and when are you going to come to our warm sunny land with lots of beaches
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Its even funnier if you picture Santa Claus LOL!
Stay safe.
Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?
*WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU KNEW YOU COULD NOT FAIL?*
http://www.myswitzerland.com/en.cfm/home
Its not that Santa lol
this santa & banta are famous in joke world they belong to the sikh communtiy
and they are like Irish jokes
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Just killing time another 40 min to go
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Santa is the jolly old fellow who drops gifts off at Christmas, but I have no idea who Banta is! =p
Stay safe buddy.
Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?
Now why would that be sounding Funny, come on, looks like you are also dead bored at office, so thats why you told me that and lol!!!
Santa is also a man...yeah right...
Santa is also a man Sarat lol
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nice jokes!!
at least i've read something cool!!
keep it up, guys and gals! :)
actually I was looking for a buddy to share the jokes....hope u will like them.
Boss: Where were you born?
sardar : Punjab ..
Boss : which part ?
sardar : Kya which part ? Whole body born in punjab.
2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have a one more.
Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi
petrol se start hoti hai.
Sardar was busy removing a wheel from his auto. A man asks sardar why
are you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardar : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler.
Sardar got into a bus on 1st April when conductor asked for ticket. He
gave
Rs.10/- and took the ticket and said April fool. I have pass.
Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the
computer.
Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.
On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him. Darling on our
engagement day will you give me a ring.
Sardar : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.
Doctor to patient : You will die within 2 hours. Do you want to see any
one before you die?
Patient : Yes. A good doctor.
How will you destroy a submarine full of sardars ?
Simple. Just knock the door and they will open it....
Santa apni girl friend ko I Luv U kehta hai aur gir jata hai.
Gal: Yeh kya kar rahe ho?
Santa: I'm falling in love.
Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken.
Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.
A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khelein
Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aaya.
At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Santa: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?
In an interview,
Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. .....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...
Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes the whole night. He got
irritated...
drank poison & said,
Ab kaato saalon, sab maroge!
Banta: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is all
India Radio!
Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Santa: Tipu's skeleton.
Tourist: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it?
Santa: That was Tipu's skeleton when he was child
Poems written by husband to wife
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I wrote your name on sand it got washed.
I wrote your name in air, it was blown away. Then
I wrote your name on my heart & I got Heart Attack.
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God saw me hungry, he created pizza .
He saw me thirsty, he created Pepsi .
He saw me in dark, he created light .
He saw me without problems, he created YOU.
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Twinkle Twinkle little star
You should know what you are
And once you know what you are
Mental hospital is not so far.
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The rain makes all things beautiful.
The grass and flowers too.
If rain makes all things beautiful
Why doesn't it rain on you?
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Roses are red, Violets are blue
Monkeys like u should be kept in zoo.
Don't feel so angry you will find me there too
Not in cage but laughing at you.
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nice....lol
Reason why never visit a 5 * Hotel
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Question : " What would you like to have ..Fruit juice, Soda, Tea, Chocolate, Milo, or Coffee?"
Answer: " tea please "
Question : " Ceylon tea, Herbal tea, Bush tea, Honey bush tea, Ice tea or green tea ?"
Answer : "Ceylon tea "
Question : "How would you like it ? Black or white ?"
Answer: "white"
Question: "Milk, Whitener, or Condensed milk ? "
Answer: "With milk "
Question: "Goat milk, Camel milk or cow milk"
Answer: "With cow milk please.
Question: " Milk from Freeze land cow or Afrikaner cow?"
Answer: " Um, I'll take it black. "
Question: " Would you like it with sweetener, sugar or honey? "
Answer: "With sugar"
Question: " Beet sugar or cane sugar ?"
Answer: "Cane sugar "
Question:" White , brown or yellow sugar ?"
Answer: "Forget about tea just give me a glass of water instead."
Question: "Mineral water or still water ? "
Answer: "Mineral water"
Question: "Flavored or non-flavored ?"
Answer: "I'll rather die of thirst
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Finally some "OTHER" stuff apart from the Men Bashing from you,
And have to accept,
Some of them were good jokes...
But hey do you know who Santa and Banta are...?
really kool jokes[img_assist|nid=13716|title=|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]
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"Imagination is more important than knowledge"
See u ain't getting anything this christmass............LOL
Motivation is when your dreams put on work clothes.
- Ben Franklin
nice jokes lol..[:D]