Todays' Proverb

No ticky, no washy!!

Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel. ~ Homer Simpson

I remember Maurice Chevalier's famous quote:

Many a man has fallen in love with a girl in a light so dim he would not have chosen a suit by it.

If you pay peanuts

you get monkeys

if your feet smell

and your nose runs

you're built upside down

If life deals you lemons, make lemonade; if it deals

you tomatoes, make Bloody Marys.

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

Isn't having a smoking section in a restaurant like

having a peeing section in a swimming pool

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

Marry in haste

Repent at leisure

What a tongue twister !!! Am still trying to make sense out of it. (Never trouble.....)

Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind.

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""ideal mind is devil workshop""

In God We Trust

(All else pay cash)

Never put off till tomorrow

What you can put off till next weekend!’

yes true

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

R u sure it's only laundry ...

I guess there are other extra free services .. lol

Like cooking, cleaning and .... wut else? i can't remember .. lol

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http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist

"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."

Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

did not get your comments or see how could it be related to the thread :)

answer is ..... expensive way to get laundry done for free

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

it's Fate ... and if u can't change ur fate change ur attitude .. lol ;)

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http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist

"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."

Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

How do most men define marriage?

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

Never trouble trouble

Until trouble troubles you;

For you only make your trouble

Double-trouble when you do;

And the trouble — like a bubble —

That you're troubling about,

May be nothing but a zero

With its rim rubbed out.

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http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist

"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."

Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

A daughter is a daughter till the end of life

A son is a son till he gets a wife

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http://www.showcaseyourmusic.com/LittleGuitarist

"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."

Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

hjsarwar??????????????????????????????

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nothing in but nothing out also

yeah ur doubter but without wiseness

A first grade school teacher in Virginia had twenty-five students in her class.

She presented each child in her classroom the first half of a well known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb.

It’s hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you. While reading, keep in mind that these are first graders, 6-year-olds, because the last one is a classic!

1. Don’t change horses ……… until they stop running.

2. Strike while the …….. bug is close.

3. It’s always darkest before ……. Daylight Saving Time.

4. Never underestimate the power of …….. termites.

5. You can lead a horse to water but …….. how?

6. Don’t bite the hand that ……… looks dirty.

7. No news is ……… impossible.

8. A miss is as good as a …….. Mr.

9. You can’t teach an old dog new …….. math.

10. If you lie down with dogs, you’ll ………stink in the morning.

11. Love all, trust …….. me.

12. The pen is mightier than the …….. pigs.

13. An idle mind is …….. the best way to relax.

14. Where there’s smoke there’s ……….pollution.

15. Happy the bride who …….. gets all the presents.

16. A penny saved is …….. not much

17. Two’s company, three’s >…….. the Musketeers

18. Don’t put off till tomorrow what ……… you put on to go to bed.

19. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and ……..you have to blow your nose.

20. There are none so blind as …….. Stevie Wonder.

21. Children should be seen and not ……. spanked or grounded.

22. If at first you don’t succeed ……. get new batteries.

23. You get out of something only what you ……. see in the picture on the box.

24. When the blind lead the blind ……..get out of the way.

And the WINNER and last one!

25. Better late than …….. pregnant. .

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

... AND GET THE BEST SEATS!!"

"The believer is happy. The doubter is wise." hmmmm...i was once told that i am a big doubter...:P

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that was a good one...

happy heart

DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home

Not only bite his finger nails...he should never give me a handshake...Thats why I do an Indian Namaste for a salutation.

some female threw a flying kiss towards me :D

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darude, this is for you: "You can lead a fool to wisdom but you can't make him think". ..now don't waste your time thinking..:D

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how could owen be bore when i am here

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

Crowded elevator smell different to midget

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

hey darude..what? i still have more here...

lol han19..what can i say...that's what happens when you are bored..:P

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darude, jauntie does say sense, :-D

owen, yea dear, funny proverb.still thinkgin about????

happy heart

DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home

Dont need ur silly proverbs this is mature club for elders kids not allowed so out :D

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then who will bite his fingernails?

Girls are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the

tree. The boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they are

afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten

apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy.So the apples at the

top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing.

They just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who's brave

enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

"Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails." ...what????...you want funny proverb right?..:D

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plz join me wana beat jauntie i will watch you guys while u carry on :d

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It isn't how you play the game

It's where you lay the blame

tata!

practice makes perfect... nobody iis perfect so why practice

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em !

hee hee

"I am nobody

Nobody is perfect

Therefore, I must be perfect!"

happy heart

DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home

Jealousy is a terrible thing :P

lol darude

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

Boys will be boys

But so will a lot of middle aged men !

i never had any peace at night coz the couple up are too much disturbing donot know are they wrestling in bed or what :/

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Got so much knowledge i think i should kill you all now :/

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Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

A conclusion is simply the place where someone got tired of thinking

happy heart

DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home

Man who drive like hell, bound to get there

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

Great mind thinks alike u are damn right but u are still far to approach my mind level :D

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Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

Great minds think alike

Fools seldom differ

when two friends fall in love they learn they are meant for each other.. when they fall out of love the realize they want to keep each other forever..."

Marriage is one mistake we all want to make willingly. In this life all good things are either illegal, immoral, or fattening.

God helps those who help themselves, BUT

God help those who help themselves!

darude, with two tiny tots, i need to have patience, to keep sane...LOL

tcm...LOL,....where you getting all this proverbs from...

happy heart

DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home

too many cooks spoil the food

just like ur proverb is spoiling

Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

You sure got patience??? r u sure?? hmm well can say yea right now coz its Ramadan now. well do answer me on Moon Night :D

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tcm...LOL

happy heart

DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home

hey darude, says who.gggrrrrrrrrr

happy heart

DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home

Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

Gravitational force is not responsible for falling in love.

"Drink Beer Save Water"

Female and Patience no way they are both enemies. never gets even.

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If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage.

happy heart

DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home

He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame

happy heart

DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home

In olden times, sacrifices were made at the altar, a practice that still continues

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

No college, No knowledge

No wife,No life

Single life is Damage life.lol

"Drink Beer Save Water"

One Glass of wine a day keep the doctors away! if the doctor is female keep drinking

1) Married life is full of excitement and frustration:

* In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.

* In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.

* In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

2)Getting married is very much like going to the restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

3)Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad?

Father: I don't know son, I'm still paying for it.

4)Son: Is it true? Dad, I heard that in ancient China, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries.

Father: That happens everywhere, son, everywhere!

Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

happy heart

DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home

(t..glass house was good...lolzz)

Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman's finger and two under the man's eyes.

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

Even if the glass is one-way?!

Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

i only know proverbs but no punch lines associated with them that are funny :-(

happy heart

DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home

I don't go to mythical places with strange men.

-- Douglas Adams, The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul.

What if the patient is female? I personally like doctors and apples, choices choices!

I don't go to mythical places with strange men.

-- Douglas Adams, The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul.

What if the patient was a female?