You see, IF i find my partner cheated on me, of course I WOULD BE HURT (devastated, MORE LIKELY)...but THEN AGAIN...
I would hold back and think what made him CHEAT? Did i do something wrong? Or something i didn't do.
Sometimes, or MAYBE (unconsciously) WE push our partners to do it...
that's why a RELATIONSHIP is like BUSINESS...you INVEST TIME AND EMOTIONS. Only you would know if it's worth saving IT (after finding out the CHEATING) OR JUST LET IT GO....
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" -Eleonor Roosevelt
everybody are cheating.. sooner or later...more or less.. "by mistake" or "on purpose"... but most of them try to hide it.. and if she/he got caught on cheating, so either she/he is an idiot, or most likely just doesn't care about you... and then the reason for ending relationship is not a cheating itself, but careless and ignorance... he/she just doesn't give a damp on you and doesn't even try to hide an affair.. this is much more hurtful than the affair itself...
but cheating... well... i can assume that the guy might be cheating on me (it could be so many different reasons why does he do it!), but untill I don't KNOW about it, don't FEEL it, and it doesn't affect our relationship, i do not care!I myself will never put a damn little effort in investigation and checking on him ... (there are some ppl who checks mobiles, pockets, whatever, trying to find something)...
Can't anwer this one. As has been said, depends on people, situation, relationship, type of cheating, etc. Could (and have) forgive a one-time drunken screw by a partner, but cheating where there was emotion involved and more than lust would be much harder. Again, depends on people and the situation, no one can answer for you.
It's up to you to decide. The fact is we all have different points as to situations that happen within a relationship to which we decide it no longer is working. tThe main point is you do what you feel is best, and remember "to live a life with regret is really not living at all."
There are different situations/reason to it all though which doesnt make it right. We all have to do what we feel is right in our lives, forgive/forget in order to move on and make ourselves better people and not do the same. As we all know long distance relationships are the worst and we have to trust that the person we care about is doing what they say they are doing. If not then soon or later "WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND" and it comes back to bite you on the butt. You usually dont get by with it because your counscience bothers you or you get caught.
cornellian , i agree with paul , as adults we can discuss issues and solutions to problems, no one is perfect but its a heavy mistake to make.
If things are very unbearable at home, then possibly leaving would be a solution if a couple havent been able to resolve things ,but turning to cheating is very disrespectful to the other partner.
Like i said everyones different but personally i wouldnt be able to accept it as trust to me is the most important to me..
There are different reasons why someone would cheat, and for me, it would depend on the situation. It hurts even thinking that it could happen, but it also hurts thinking I wouldnt be with my husband if he cheated.
to cornellian ur sample is happening now a days but still its a reason to cheat ur partner or to ur lover,he/she is selfish .....why not think their kids?or look the good side of the situation than looking to the cute and warm co-worker its an excuse or else everybody will cheat to their partner
I think it depends on the situation. I have always stood by a simple rule in all my relationships in regards to this which is I would rather know than not know. Work it out and move on from it (stay, dont stay)
Ur right Paul; however, the key word is "SHOULD". There are many things we SHOULD do yet don't. They both made a mistake of not communicating, it happens. Noone's perfect.
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong -Garfield
It's funny how we all attribute people's actions directly to their personality and not their circumstances. Sometimes when a person does a bad thing, it's not cause he's a bad person but because he was put in a bad situation.
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong -Garfield
Well I'm speaking logically; however, should it happen to me, I honestly don't know how I would react or whether I would forgive the person or not.
Nadt, u just said "jumping into bed with someone"; however, u failed to mention the circumstance in which that happened. Let's say for example, a couple have been married for a long time, each with a different career and soon enough they become distant and pre-occupied with children, work, etc and grew more apart instead of communicating and solving the issue. The husband finds a cute, warm co-worker who's always listening to him, showing him affection, making him laugh, etc instead of going back home and worrying about the bills and nagging, etc and so he makes the mistake and sleeps with her. What would u say to a situation like that ? Was it completely his fault ? Or did the circumstance drive him to her arms ? Yes he did a bad thing but then again we could've all easily made the same mistake should we have been put in the same situation.
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong -Garfield
trust is one of the fundation of relation and etc .....but if its gone already....its cooking u forget one ingridients still same menu but the taste no....u can taste something is missing ,......
i dont see how jumping into bed with someone is a mistake, you either did it intentionally or not regardless of what the circumstances are. I can see how others forgive but sorry i cant.
i must agree cornellian. chance should be there if u r really ve good understanding in the past. also keep the way of cheat in mind . if its real horrible one then . just....forget him or her.
Yes they betrayed ur trust and that's a major factor in a relationship. But what about forgiveness, second chances and understanding? Aren't they also a part of a relationship? I'm not saying I'd forgive in all situations but sometimes people make mistakes, noone's perfect, and so it depends on the severity, reasons, situation, etc
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong -Garfield
I agree with Mr Paul..never..its betrayal of trust and if you dont have trust in relationship then its very hard to be together, there will always be doubt....
you can forgive but not to the extent to continue the relationship..it's over..they did it,there must be reason,and they must be happy,not with you:D...so let them be...
Mistakes are done by Humans! And all of us are Humans here.... It could be you also on the otehr hand.....Forgiving is always better than punishing! I know its not easy... I feel shaken up by what I'm writing also... but thats what I'm thinking and thats what I'm writing it down....
It really depends on the people and the situation. Some people make mistakes, and you have to decide if it's worth giving up your entire relationship for.
why don't seek things that will put you in trouble later like getting drunk or getting so mad and try to get even ... I don't think that I can trust someone who cheated on me once, I would have always in mind ... If i'm not there ... what might be happening now?
It is not really that easy, talking to someone else it might be ... but getting too close like that as sleeping with him/her in one bed??? I'm sorry but that is really hard ...
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. (Gautama Buddha)
My finacee and I were together 6 years, from 17 to 22, and I cheated on him, foolishly one night while drunk and freaking out about finished uni and having only been with one guy in my whole life, blah blah blah. He was upset but we worked through it.
No there's the situation that my boyfriend and I are in different countries, if he or I makes a mistake while drinking, well, I have to take into consideration our situation and my feelings for him.
The first blink in your mind is that NOWAYZ! No forgiveness... and now the other thought ....think it as if you need to spend all your life without him/her... and now try to answer the question again.... then again.. you can tell from your partners eyes whether he/she will do that again or not... and its only you who can answer it... so all of you ppl saying NO... think again.. you might be juss able to change your answer to this one!
If that happened ... then that would be the last day of our relation. If she/he cheated today with someone ... how can someone grantee that it would never happen again tomorrow? Some of them like to play on all ropes and mix the roles of the game ... Let them play alone, I don't need someone like that ...
I know that it might be painful to do so, but there is dignity and pride i guess ... None of us like those to be hurt ... Coming from someone very close it is really painful ..
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. (Gautama Buddha)
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i did and i regret it...a lot!
dpends in situation but me no.....
honesty is the best policy
my answer is NO
Can you make it in english?
我懂移不是一件简坦的事。
要接受设要横宽容的心。
Forgive and Forget..
but that's not easy to do.. really...
อืม ไม่ง่ายๆๆๆ
trust no more...
"Even if LOVE is full of thorns, embrace it. For in between those thorns there is a ROSE that's worth all the PAIN."
Depends on the situation...
You see, IF i find my partner cheated on me, of course I WOULD BE HURT (devastated, MORE LIKELY)...but THEN AGAIN...
I would hold back and think what made him CHEAT? Did i do something wrong? Or something i didn't do.
Sometimes, or MAYBE (unconsciously) WE push our partners to do it...
that's why a RELATIONSHIP is like BUSINESS...you INVEST TIME AND EMOTIONS. Only you would know if it's worth saving IT (after finding out the CHEATING) OR JUST LET IT GO....
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" -Eleonor Roosevelt
everybody are cheating.. sooner or later...more or less.. "by mistake" or "on purpose"... but most of them try to hide it.. and if she/he got caught on cheating, so either she/he is an idiot, or most likely just doesn't care about you... and then the reason for ending relationship is not a cheating itself, but careless and ignorance... he/she just doesn't give a damp on you and doesn't even try to hide an affair.. this is much more hurtful than the affair itself...
but cheating... well... i can assume that the guy might be cheating on me (it could be so many different reasons why does he do it!), but untill I don't KNOW about it, don't FEEL it, and it doesn't affect our relationship, i do not care!I myself will never put a damn little effort in investigation and checking on him ... (there are some ppl who checks mobiles, pockets, whatever, trying to find something)...
*********************** [img_assist|nid=94186|title=qatarisun|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]
for those who are still in doubts:
I am not a MAN/BRO... I am a WOMAN/SIS...
No!No! shows the eyes are wondering already time for a sharp exit!!Run for the Hills......
Can't anwer this one. As has been said, depends on people, situation, relationship, type of cheating, etc. Could (and have) forgive a one-time drunken screw by a partner, but cheating where there was emotion involved and more than lust would be much harder. Again, depends on people and the situation, no one can answer for you.
Never!
"cheated"is past tense, I dont deal with the past.
Guess YES with all my heart.
Never go younger by a month, a hard bod is no substitute for wisdom.
i have no regret what uve done anyway its not my lost its him.......
honesty is the best policy
It's up to you to decide. The fact is we all have different points as to situations that happen within a relationship to which we decide it no longer is working. tThe main point is you do what you feel is best, and remember "to live a life with regret is really not living at all."
you....
Its your life, your choices !
[img_assist|nid=89096|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]
thanx guyz for the opinion but still i cant get the point.....
it happen to me once but i never listen for an explaination i just go and escape the situation coz its really hurts a lots,the one u love betray u
honesty is the best policy
There are different situations/reason to it all though which doesnt make it right. We all have to do what we feel is right in our lives, forgive/forget in order to move on and make ourselves better people and not do the same. As we all know long distance relationships are the worst and we have to trust that the person we care about is doing what they say they are doing. If not then soon or later "WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND" and it comes back to bite you on the butt. You usually dont get by with it because your counscience bothers you or you get caught.
you dont have to go through what i did....Cos when it happens, it will destroy your world...And thats a FACT !!!!
[img_assist|nid=89096|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]
But the issue of trust in a relationship is in my view only broken if the person doent fess up or admits what they did.
cornellian , i agree with paul , as adults we can discuss issues and solutions to problems, no one is perfect but its a heavy mistake to make.
If things are very unbearable at home, then possibly leaving would be a solution if a couple havent been able to resolve things ,but turning to cheating is very disrespectful to the other partner.
Like i said everyones different but personally i wouldnt be able to accept it as trust to me is the most important to me..
There are different reasons why someone would cheat, and for me, it would depend on the situation. It hurts even thinking that it could happen, but it also hurts thinking I wouldnt be with my husband if he cheated.
tra la la
Well sorry to hear that Paul, but that's YOUR experience, doesn't mean it's the same for everyone.
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong -Garfield
to cornellian ur sample is happening now a days but still its a reason to cheat ur partner or to ur lover,he/she is selfish .....why not think their kids?or look the good side of the situation than looking to the cute and warm co-worker its an excuse or else everybody will cheat to their partner
honesty is the best policy
I think it depends on the situation. I have always stood by a simple rule in all my relationships in regards to this which is I would rather know than not know. Work it out and move on from it (stay, dont stay)
and how can someone who willingly gets into bed with someone, who is not their partner, be put in a bad situation.
I didnt put her in a bad situation, she did it of her own accord !!
[img_assist|nid=89096|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]
Ur right Paul; however, the key word is "SHOULD". There are many things we SHOULD do yet don't. They both made a mistake of not communicating, it happens. Noone's perfect.
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong -Garfield
no
It's funny how we all attribute people's actions directly to their personality and not their circumstances. Sometimes when a person does a bad thing, it's not cause he's a bad person but because he was put in a bad situation.
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong -Garfield
marriage . Jumping into bed with a warm co-worker will only strain the marriage more !!!
[img_assist|nid=89096|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]
Well I'm speaking logically; however, should it happen to me, I honestly don't know how I would react or whether I would forgive the person or not.
Nadt, u just said "jumping into bed with someone"; however, u failed to mention the circumstance in which that happened. Let's say for example, a couple have been married for a long time, each with a different career and soon enough they become distant and pre-occupied with children, work, etc and grew more apart instead of communicating and solving the issue. The husband finds a cute, warm co-worker who's always listening to him, showing him affection, making him laugh, etc instead of going back home and worrying about the bills and nagging, etc and so he makes the mistake and sleeps with her. What would u say to a situation like that ? Was it completely his fault ? Or did the circumstance drive him to her arms ? Yes he did a bad thing but then again we could've all easily made the same mistake should we have been put in the same situation.
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong -Garfield
trust is one of the fundation of relation and etc .....but if its gone already....its cooking u forget one ingridients still same menu but the taste no....u can taste something is missing ,......
pls correct me if im wrong....
honesty is the best policy
i dont see how jumping into bed with someone is a mistake, you either did it intentionally or not regardless of what the circumstances are. I can see how others forgive but sorry i cant.
I cant see myself with that person anymore...
do I still love her? sorry but cant forgive cheating.
nothing can excuse cheating for me
Cos thats wot yer all saying......
[img_assist|nid=89096|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]
"Anyone who say justice doesn't come from the barrel of a gun obviously has never had a chance to shoot a child molestor."
i must agree cornellian. chance should be there if u r really ve good understanding in the past. also keep the way of cheat in mind . if its real horrible one then . just....forget him or her.
Yes they betrayed ur trust and that's a major factor in a relationship. But what about forgiveness, second chances and understanding? Aren't they also a part of a relationship? I'm not saying I'd forgive in all situations but sometimes people make mistakes, noone's perfect, and so it depends on the severity, reasons, situation, etc
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong -Garfield
I agree with Mr Paul..never..its betrayal of trust and if you dont have trust in relationship then its very hard to be together, there will always be doubt....
yes.
If they betray yer trust, then the main ingredient in a relationship has gone.....
And i speak from Experience !
[img_assist|nid=89096|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]
"Anyone who say justice doesn't come from the barrel of a gun obviously has never had a chance to shoot a child molestor."
You can't teach experience...
you can forgive but not to the extent to continue the relationship..it's over..they did it,there must be reason,and they must be happy,not with you:D...so let them be...
Once he / she did it,it's not impossible for them to do it again..even if they beg for your sorry and promised that he will never do it again..keiz?!?
nope dunno where he's been...yukk
Mistakes are done by Humans! And all of us are Humans here.... It could be you also on the otehr hand.....Forgiving is always better than punishing! I know its not easy... I feel shaken up by what I'm writing also... but thats what I'm thinking and thats what I'm writing it down....
it depends on the situation!
but frankly, i will let her suffer for the choice she made...
(it hurts you know, it hurts!! *hehehe*)
****************************************
PEACE NOT WAR FOR 2008!
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It really depends on the people and the situation. Some people make mistakes, and you have to decide if it's worth giving up your entire relationship for.
Visit www.qatarhappening.com
why don't seek things that will put you in trouble later like getting drunk or getting so mad and try to get even ... I don't think that I can trust someone who cheated on me once, I would have always in mind ... If i'm not there ... what might be happening now?
It is not really that easy, talking to someone else it might be ... but getting too close like that as sleeping with him/her in one bed??? I'm sorry but that is really hard ...
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. (Gautama Buddha)
My finacee and I were together 6 years, from 17 to 22, and I cheated on him, foolishly one night while drunk and freaking out about finished uni and having only been with one guy in my whole life, blah blah blah. He was upset but we worked through it.
No there's the situation that my boyfriend and I are in different countries, if he or I makes a mistake while drinking, well, I have to take into consideration our situation and my feelings for him.
Visit www.qatarhappening.com
NO...maybe
for friendship > Q A T A R E X . C O M
gypsy what situation it is?//////
honesty is the best policy
The first blink in your mind is that NOWAYZ! No forgiveness... and now the other thought ....think it as if you need to spend all your life without him/her... and now try to answer the question again.... then again.. you can tell from your partners eyes whether he/she will do that again or not... and its only you who can answer it... so all of you ppl saying NO... think again.. you might be juss able to change your answer to this one!
Her or Him? As Corne and I said, it depends on the situation.
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really u will still her ???????????
u mean u have a big heart to accecpt her after all those thing she done to u no matter reason she has
honesty is the best policy
I agree with Gypsy, it really depends on the situation.
I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong -Garfield
yah right if she/he did it today what is the assurance he wont do it the next time around
honesty is the best policy
If that happened ... then that would be the last day of our relation. If she/he cheated today with someone ... how can someone grantee that it would never happen again tomorrow? Some of them like to play on all ropes and mix the roles of the game ... Let them play alone, I don't need someone like that ...
I know that it might be painful to do so, but there is dignity and pride i guess ... None of us like those to be hurt ... Coming from someone very close it is really painful ..
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. (Gautama Buddha)
jeez how many times will people ask this question. Why dont u search it and u will know...
--------------------
No human can stop racism.
Can't be in a loving relationship and not trust your partner. Sorry cheating breaks every bond.
Depends on the situation.
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Cheater is not lovable!!
i wont... but sum ppl do......
NO.. will never.. being cheated, means shattering the trust you have for each other....
[img_assist|nid=12867|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.