what can you do about a man who really loves you and wants to marry you but has an other wife?
i have been with this man for 2 years and all that time i was getting to know him. he loves me and has done a lot for me. at first i didnt know he had a wife and he recently came to tell me that he has and he hasnt been intouch with her for the 2 years he was with me. they have been having problems. and he is married to her for 3 years due to arranged marriage by the family.he has never lived with her in a house and he was waiting to finish and graduate from school so that he can live with her as his wife. but on the journey he came to know me and now he has rented a house for me and i live happily. this is because from the day he told me about his wife, he said that he will divorce her. but now that he is at his home town the family had begged him not to and that he can have as 4 wives as he can. well the wife is ok with this situation but its driving me crazy.i do love he does as well and yet i dont wanna lose him.he tells me he is gonna come back to me and that we have to get married now. so muslim brothers and sisters please help me how should be?how should i act?what should i do?
and yet the issue here is that he says he will divorce her one because she is full of problems. so please help me as am going crazy alone in the house where he rented for me.
thank you
iptisam
move on girl, hes playing you...and using his religion to get what he wants..save yourself heartache and move
on.
What you should do is think about the other option....No house and no man (married or not).
Stick with the guy, take as much money and gifts as you can (his wife is), and leave once you have a better option. A monkey doesn't let go of a branch until she is holding onto another. Men will be men, and women will be women...face it you're not the first or the last mistress.
Unfortunately if he did in fact love you he would of told you about the wife from day one and he would not of gotton so serious with you without marrying you or giving you that option, since in fact he can marry more than one! I had a friend once who had an affair with a married man and then he married her and in the end he ended up leaving my friend with two kids for another women, its sad but its their behavior. I say find a man that is more respectful. Normally they don't marry the women they play with! Sorry.
Maybe he is not as bad as you all suggest. His first "marriage" was arranged. He wasn't even through school. So, he must have been very young. Then he fell in love, and this was not "arranged". And now he may have difficulties to divorce. Give him a chance. Maybe he deserves it, as you do.
Do not trust a Qatari
Don't trust a Qatari.
FULL STOP!
grow up! he already lied to you for 2 years.. go find someone else.. stop dreaming juliet, his not romeo.. just ask yourself this, are you going to be happy with him knowing he has another wife? are you sure his not gonna marry another woman, when he is sick and tired of seeing your faces? did he felt love for u in his heart, or in somewhere below his waist?
but you have the power to decide not me or anyone else here in this world. its ur life, live it ur way.
and arranged marriage fuck+ng sucks...
Dear Ibtisam ,
from the answers i found and ur problem , most have gave u their opinion , but the facts are different , u know that the whole thing is a miskate , he lies , he have another house , and another person with feeling also and you to ...
but lets be frank,we are weak as a human,and u will accepts mistakes and his situation, so dnt think that much and think in only one issue if u can leave him leave him , if not accept and handle all the pain that might come ... feel from inside , see how true he is, if he didnt lie from begining i would say he deserve a chance..
its u r life , u decide coz u will handle all the hurts.
hope u will find ur way
the best thing to do is pray, perform salatul istikhara. Allah will guide you.
Are you sure you can trust him ? Living 2 years , or one year , or even few months in such a lie?.... I dont want to say that he is liar, maybe he has his own reasons, but if you have realy worth relation you should be able to say to each other everything , without hiding , without fear , with expectations of understanding and patience... I hope you will find the right decision and you will be happy... Be strong!
I Do agree with the previous comment (mparao ) 120% ... this is human nature, he could lie in the very begining .. so .. he might do it again ... if u do it ... u will always feel like u ruined a house ... wish u the best of luck ...
Dear,
if a person is not faithful to his first wife, how he could be trustworthy for you and he did not informed you about his marriage when he started relationship with you. To me, any relationship staring with false ground is not worthwhile. anyhow, u r best judge to decide urselves, good luck and take your time to decide
Be his second wife and live happily ever after like Cinderella and the 7 dwarves....
If he is muslim, then he can marry you also as long as he can support you and his wife...