Post-arranged marriage for "ex-girlfriend'?

mallrat
By mallrat

How to deal with the post-arranged marriage feelings for the "ex girlfriend"?
Take this example: An young Indian man has a girlfriend who he loves. Could be a childhood sweetheart, a friend. Feelings develop, but then his parents inform him that they have found a "suitable match" for him and he is to marry their preference. He reluctantly goes ahead, because not pleasing his parents is not pleasing the Gods, so to speak.
He marries despite still having deep feelings for his girlfriend.
How does he deal with these feelings, while, at the same time, being married to his new bride?
How common is this situation in India?
Unresolved feelings before the arranged marriage?
How do they get resolved?
How?
How?
How?

By mical• 19 Oct 2009 11:27
Rating: 2/5
mical

you can keep them together buddy....

" Tomorrow is not just another day, it's another chance..."

By anonymous• 19 Oct 2009 11:17
anonymous

so here we have a mind numming sick moron proviking

religious bashing

ahhh!!!! qliving is so incomplete without these fool's

------------------------------------------------------

There are good people in this world, and they are not ONLY Muslims, you know. Geez.(last comments by alexa when she left Qiving)

By BULLONG• 19 Oct 2009 11:11
BULLONG

work hard, save enough and be converted into a religion that allows you to marry more than one wife!!!!!!!

By AbuSaif• 19 Oct 2009 10:58
Rating: 4/5
AbuSaif

If one has taken a decision then he should do his best to fulfill his decision.... forget the past and live with present.

However religiously speaking: This is one of the few things, if you say NO to your parents, no sin is on you in front of Allah.. (with most humblest of way with and the truth should be shared etc)

By anonymous• 19 Oct 2009 10:51
Rating: 5/5
anonymous

i say if u love her/him then go for it no matter what like i did its worth taking the risk

and if u back out like a coward after being with the partner for so long then u not meant to fall in love

where there is a risk there is a reward

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There are good people in this world, and they are not ONLY Muslims, you know. Geez.(last comments by alexa when she left Qiving)

By mallrat• 19 Oct 2009 10:32
mallrat

.'Those who do not have guts to convince the parents should not love,

.

because they dont have balls', lol..

.

.

Talk to my crown......

.

By BF• 19 Oct 2009 10:02
BF

so true.

'We were given: Two hands to hold. To legs to walk. Two eyes to see. Two ears to listen. But why only one heart? Because the other was given to someone else. For us to find'.

Stay REAL

By anonymous• 19 Oct 2009 09:48
anonymous

1st of all u can't call that love,, ur coward,,, y u didn't speak at d 1st place... y u let this thing happened? If u do really love dat gurl like wat u said,,, u should fight for wat u n ur gurl having dat moment..

We were given: Two hands to hold. To legs to walk. Two eyes to see. Two ears to listen. But why only one heart? Because the other was given to someone else. For us to find.

By britexpat• 19 Oct 2009 09:37
britexpat

The past is the past. you are now married, with a new "life" partner. The old memories have to be erased.

By BF• 19 Oct 2009 09:35
Rating: 5/5
BF

Those who do not have guts to convince the parents should not love.

God has not entrusted your parents to get you married. If you loved a girl, be man enough to make her your partner.

Its lame excuse that its against God if you are going against the wishes of parents.

Stay REAL

By timebandit• 18 Oct 2009 20:31
Rating: 4/5
timebandit

I suppose polygamy is out of the question?

By Lion_King• 18 Oct 2009 20:20
Rating: 4/5
Lion_King

Well, you have to make a decision, ultimately it's your life and you have to make some sacrifice to achieve something!

By stealth• 18 Oct 2009 20:13
stealth

looks like you are in trouble buddy.

By qatarisun• 18 Oct 2009 20:10
Rating: 5/5
qatarisun

be married the arranged one, and have the first one as a mistress.. what's the problem?

*********************

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are small compared to what lies within us."

Oliver Wendell Holmes

By anonymous• 18 Oct 2009 19:42
anonymous

follow the dicision of your parents...and if your marriage does not work well blame your parents...

By mmyke• 18 Oct 2009 19:36
Rating: 4/5
mmyke

that are best undertaken by two knowing and committed people.

Perhaps, when we all came from families who lived in smaller centers and simpler times, arranged marriages cemented societal structure favourably,,,,but thisgs are different now, and arranged marriages, I am told, too often bring disimiliar people to the marriage.

Perhaps we need modern-day matchmakers who can do the job better....

M

By anonymous• 18 Oct 2009 19:31
Rating: 3/5
anonymous

a strong decision and stick ot it whole life.........life never gives you many chances but life give you oppurtunities...............

Proud To Be A PAKISTANI

.~*AnteecA*~.

By mmyke• 18 Oct 2009 19:27
mmyke

go with your head and your heart, or your life will be forever miserable....

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