How can I stop a crazy harasser???

shell
By shell

I met a girl who I was working with and we became quite friendly, but after that she suddenly started stalking me because she got upset that i once had left without saying goodbye from her birthday. This person is known to have a history of mental illness, but she is from a quite influential family. From that day she is threatening me and insulting me, accused me of prostitution, drug dealing, and threatening me that the CID is gonna get me deported, but of course I am involved in none of these things.
What worries me is that this is so obcessive from her part and it turned into a lot of hating from her, so much that i worry about what she could do.
Can a person from an big family get you in trouble when you are innocent? What about my reputation she is telling horrible lies to everyone at work and she shouts at me in public but i don't ever answer.
If you know any way to help or how to make her stop please let me know. Should I go to the police? or court? or will it land me in trouble since i am a foreigner?

By ntasa• 24 May 2010 13:40
Rating: 2/5
ntasa

I really feel sorry for you being in such an unconfortable situation with a qatari girl.

You should've avoided it in the first place; or tried to keep her calm at all cost (once you knew her condition).

I'd suggest to patch up with her, if its possible. You can try this, won't hurt anything. simple words of apologies or any kind gestures would push her change her attitude I hope. Then you could start pulling away, while being sympathetic to her situation. Find her something/someone else to play with .. loose here sight/attention/confrontation etc.

some ways to stop humiliating you in public or at work. (you can't keep wearing t-shirt.. saying she's a craxy lunatic)

"Can a person from an big family get you in trouble when you are innocent?" -

Yes, its quite possible. But since you've already spoken well & explained the situation to his father, don't worry nothing will happen.

Police or the Court of first instance, obviously are unaware of her history, so before you could start explaining or bring her family to support you .. you could face lot of trouble with them I guess.

However, believe me you have same rights as a local here.. except the interpretation/implementations can be different. The government authorities will tend to listen to a local first.

hope you'd find peace with this craxy girl.

good luck

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 13:25
anonymous

My other name could be lizard, cockroach, cat ....even a rat.......QLers never stop amusing me.

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 13:22
anonymous

Khawaga.......your loss......

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 13:18
anonymous

I am not into writing, although I read a lot

By Khawaga• 24 May 2010 13:14
Khawaga

Yes, because the only megalomaniacs and paranoid people in history have been white. And all black and Asian people everywhere are passive. Great. Remind me not to ever consult your so-called "expertise" in anything...

By Colt45• 24 May 2010 13:14
Colt45

is your other name cockroach? lol!!!

By Olive• 24 May 2010 13:07
Olive

You should write a book about stereotypes around the world.

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 13:06
anonymous

Defensive personalities, passive people.........

You want to know about whites........paranoid personality, megalomaniacs............lolz

By Olive• 24 May 2010 13:02
Olive

Could you tell me about the personalities of black people? how about Asians?

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 12:58
anonymous

Thanks......ahmmm......

By Olive• 24 May 2010 11:38
Olive

Wow your generalizations are just wonderful.

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 11:36
anonymous

It's personality type,,role modelling (family), culture and upbringing. So commoner in certain races.

By Olive• 24 May 2010 11:31
Olive

Well there we go sun, PTSD + severe head trauma causing erratic behaviour. But as I said, you can't blame her behaviour on her race, especially if you don't know how she behaved before.

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 11:27
anonymous

If anybody behaved like this, it is not PTSD. If they behaved like this it is PTSD+ something.

By Olive• 24 May 2010 11:21
Olive

I know two people with PTSD and they've both behaved in similar ways to this girl. There are also numerous other issues that can stem from severe head trauma. The question is whether or not she was like this before the accident.

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 09:27
anonymous

PTSD can also lead to addictions

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 09:24
anonymous

Post traumatic stress syndrome leads to apathy, sleeplessness, nightmares, sometimes amnesia, withdrawal and excessive defensive behaviour in perceived threatened situation, but not to aggression and certainly not stalking.

By Olive• 24 May 2010 09:19
Olive

You do realize violent and extreme behaviour such as this is a symptom of post traumatic stress. If this girl was involved in such a horrific car accident I don't doubt she suffers from it. As would many members of terrorist organizations, given the war torn areas they come from.

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 09:17
anonymous

Olive trust me I am or wouldn't be making this statement. I find it very funny when this is the explanation given for violent behaviour of some al qaeda and Arab leaders. These kind of behaviour are more of an indication of inborn mental retardation and/ or a bad upbringing. These people are maladjusted people.

By Olive• 24 May 2010 08:41
Olive

Sorry I sun I didn't realize you were as much an expert on neurological disorders as you are on generalizing entire race's.

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 08:36
anonymous

Olive there is no head injury in this world which can make a woman stalk another woman. This a normal Arab behaviour when their ego is hurt. She is having an aggressive personality type. Pacify her. End of the story. But such people are very simple hearted and childish.

By Olive• 24 May 2010 08:28
Olive

I don't think it's got anything to do with her ego, as Shell said, she was involved in a bad car accident a few years ago and suffered brain damage. I don't think she's a serious threat.

By anonymous• 24 May 2010 08:23
Rating: 2/5
anonymous

1)She is having an ego problem which can be sorted out by directly talking to her

2) She cannot make a police complaint or anything unless male members of her family are supporting her

3) Don't try to pressurise her through male members as she could be simply jealous.

She is harmless, try to avoid any physical harm she can do to you like slapping. Maintain distance and talk.

By Olive• 24 May 2010 07:56
Olive

I think you should be ok Shell. If you've spoken to her father and he says that she won't be able to press charges I would believe him. He might not be able to prevent her from yelling at you, but he can prevent any charges being put through the police.

Frankly going to the police may upset him, and that you might not want to do. Get in touch with her father again and see if there's any change in the situation, and stress how much it's upsetting you. I'm sure he'll sympathize and appreciate your attempt to keep this quiet and in the family.

I know it's tough, but the poor girl has obvious mental issues and I'm sure the family is at its wits end, because you probably aren't the only one she's doing this to.

By shell• 23 May 2010 23:26
shell

thanks Xena...yea unfortunately...oh btw...I may be having a lil guest for a while;)))) gana meet him tom morn to see if he gets on wit the other 2:) I had a competition yesterday and couldnt make it:( thanks wk but there are easier ways to leave lol...and very true shapil lol:)

By Xena• 23 May 2010 23:23
Xena

Inshalla....

By anonymous• 23 May 2010 23:16
anonymous

Wanted to come but got stuck :(

Will see you soon :)

By Xena• 23 May 2010 23:15
Xena

Missed you yesterday too...

By shapil• 23 May 2010 23:14
shapil

"she got upset that i once had left without saying goodbye from her birthday"....women can be really crazy...a man wont even remember who all came to his party :)

By anonymous• 23 May 2010 23:08
anonymous

I can harass her for you, will thank her too if she gets me deported :(

By Xena• 23 May 2010 23:05
Xena

I cannot believe what I am hearing... This is aweful...

After all your years here and all the cra*p you had to now go through this also...

Call me for a coffee sometime:-)

PS... we missed you at yesterdays event...

By shell• 23 May 2010 23:02
shell

Enigmatic I didnt receive it???...Eco Savvy thanks...I have messages and threats.

By anonymous• 23 May 2010 22:58
anonymous

try to record her threating calls/shouts. No sheikhas can get away with harassment

By Enigmatic• 23 May 2010 22:52
Enigmatic

check it. It'll help you

By Enigmatic• 23 May 2010 22:50
Enigmatic

I sent you pm check it it will help you alot

By shapil• 23 May 2010 22:44
shapil

You will first have to do the sex change and then the system will allow u to change ur nationality...but really even I had tried to do it but could not figure out how to change it in the profile..

By shell• 23 May 2010 22:39
shell

I am a female, and a european....I made my profile over 2 years ago and I have tried to change the qatari bit which was a mistake....actually how do i change it?

By riaz_ak• 23 May 2010 22:37
riaz_ak

according to your profile, you are a qatari girl. & you say that it is a mistake in your profile. First confirm that you are a male or a female? you are a qatari or european? Why you feel ashamed of your nationality? How can some one trust your story coz you already prove yourself a lier..

Plzz dont mind it..

By shapil• 23 May 2010 22:35
shapil

its getting hot in here :)

By shell• 23 May 2010 22:34
shell

and you WILL be burnt

By anonymous• 23 May 2010 22:33
anonymous

Fight fire with fire

By shell• 23 May 2010 22:30
shell

lol...flanostu...shes married!!!..and a woman...and after what colt was saying...thats fuel for the fire;)

By shapil• 23 May 2010 22:27
shapil

that would be brutal considering the circumstances..:)

By flanostu• 23 May 2010 22:23
flanostu

have sex with her.

By Colt45• 23 May 2010 21:16
Colt45

I'm not trying to scare you, but the reason I say this is because I know of a guy who was deported back to his home town by the CID. The sad part was, he was given no reason for their decision to deport him, but just said it came from the ministry.

Some "biggie's" (and when i say that I mean REAL BIG influential people, even known to the Emir) from his workplace tried to intervene, but they could not do shit to keep him here.

Our guess was that he was doing something illegal or must have behaved inappropriately with some women he should'nt have. But he was not imprisoned, not even for an hour, just told to get the eff outta here in 3 days.

Like Moody said, be yourself and play it cool. Just don't give them any reason to get you on the wrong foot for anything silly.

By anonymous• 23 May 2010 21:07
anonymous

Don't Worry Shell she hasn't got a PLEE and she has no evidences, leen on me if you need help but never listen to what she is saying or threatening just be DEAF for her and keep a smile with no jumbling or distortion.

Mody.

By shell• 23 May 2010 21:05
shell

haha and in the bars....she is illegally going into them by using her american passport...oh and I never thought that it was possible to have 2 passports when you are Qatari.....

By shell• 23 May 2010 21:03
shell

thanks colt..I am very careful of my behaviour everywhere as I know this..and thankfully I never replied her abuse with abuse....

By Colt45• 23 May 2010 20:57
Colt45

Like you decided, i too feel it's best you keep the cops informed of her behaviour towards you. If at all anything happens, at least you know you did your part by informing the cops.

Also let them know that you have informed her father and husband of her behaviour towards you and that they told you about her mental condition and have assured you nothing would happen to you.

Also be very careful with how you act in public, bars, etc. Coz "if" at all she's complained to the cops about what you said up there, then the smallest wrong-doing on your part can get you into a mess, which could lead to your deportation.

Good luck!

By anonymous• 23 May 2010 20:32
anonymous

you a lot o tension Just ignore her completely and everything will be alright.

By shell• 23 May 2010 20:30
shell

thanks moody...believe me I am trying to avoid her....But unfortunately I work at the place where she keeps her horse!!!!!....and today I came around the corner and she was there screaming at me, telling me to just wait, the police are coming and you are going to jail....actually the police can come as I am not doing anything. tomorrow I am going to the police with everything... thanks for all your advice.

By shapil• 23 May 2010 20:27
shapil

If I were you...i would meet her and find out what exactly is it that she is so pissed about and how to rectify it...if that fails and she can be potentially dangerous, I would go to police and tell them the whole situation. Then i would just ignore her.

By anonymous• 23 May 2010 20:24
Rating: 2/5
anonymous

I REPEAT JUST AVOID HER, SHELL.

FORGET ANY PLACE THAT YOU CAN SEE HER IN.

CHANGE MOBILE NUMBER.

SHOW NO WORRY, INTEREST, CONCERN AT ALL JUST IGNORE HER.

By t_coffee_or_me• 23 May 2010 20:21
t_coffee_or_me

Change your telephone number.

By anonymous• 23 May 2010 20:20
anonymous

From your story I understand you are en europian and she is a Qatari girl, anyway try to get in touch with a trusty person in her family to stop harrasing you and be brave enough, let her go to hell and AVOID GOING TO PLACES THAT YOU CAN FIND HER. GOOD LUCK.

By shell• 23 May 2010 20:17
shell

I did in the beginning forward all the messages to her father....i did not answer them at all. Her father said nothing will happen to me, but that was over 2 months ago and she is not stopping at all. Bear in mind that she is not stable at all, she had an accident which caused a fatality and she had massive head injuries. Her father and husband I know has no control over her as I have heard the way she speaks to her whole family.

By davidz• 23 May 2010 20:11
davidz

Feel no worry for as long as you are doing your job, and you believe that you are a clean person, so just relax and avoid her if you can.

By aiskaleem• 23 May 2010 20:10
aiskaleem

SIMPLY GO TO POLICE, TELL THEM THE TRUTH OR IDEALLY YOU CAN FILE A CASE AGAINST HER. KEEP IN MIND THAT ULTIMATELY YOU HAVE TO LEAVE THE COUNTRY AS YOU ARE A FOREIGNER. BUT IF YOU ARE NOT GUILTY OF ANYTHING THEN YOU CAN RELAX. AT LEAST YOU HAVE A PEACE OF MIND.

By anonymous• 23 May 2010 20:10
anonymous

Guess you both were really friendly and it went really in to her...

you sure that there is no other reason for it? did you try contacting her family and explain the situvation? what do they say?

I guess her family could help you or maybe her husband if she is married.

By shell• 23 May 2010 20:04
shell

actually...i am not...that was a mistake...i am european

By drmana• 23 May 2010 19:56
drmana

From your profile, you are a Qatari female and now another Qatari female is stalking you????

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