Requesting experienced child psychologist/ counselor advice
Date: September 26th, 2018
Dear All,
Good day to you all.
We have a six and half year old boy. He is a sweet soul but has some difficulty in communication. His native language (Bangla) vocabulary stock is not that large and as a result, he often has difficulty understanding instructions. Add to that, we are non-english speaking. He had been homeschooled so far with occassional visits to kids tutorials. We thought, with time and more social interactions, he'll pickup more words and things will be ok. As an expatriate freelancing professional I couldn't relocate my family everytime I was going abroad for projects. So, he grew up and and spent a long time with his grandparents.
Since we moved to Qatar, we enrolled him in a proper english medium school at Grade 01. First week was fine but after that, he has started to exhibit strong aversion to school in general. His crying and tantrums often get out of control (as per the school staffs description). Apparently, he has lashed out at people around (which is so out of character). However, when he calms down, he gets on with classworks and homeworks and seems receptive. Nonetheless, We have temporarily stopped sending him to school (school staff also seems to have given up on him) and trying to figure out how to solve the situation. He is demanding to go back home to his grandparents. It sounds like a kid being difficult, but, given his lack of communication ability, I understand his frustration.
At this point, we are still absorbing the shock but would like to get some professional help as well. We don't want to force anything on him and want to make informed decisions keeping in mind of his condition. I'll appreciate it if you can refer an experienced child psychologist/ counselor.
Thanks in advance.
Regards,
iat7b
Besides giving him full love and attention, if a 6.5 yrs old has difficulty in communication, then definitely it's a red flag and needs to be addressed appropriately. I suggest you take an appointment with QISH (Qatar institute for speech & Hearing), they have Psychology department for kids that deals with Developmental/childhood disorders, Intellectual disabilities, Behavioral and emotional disorders of children and adolescence, Anxiety and stress related disorders, etc...
Also, you can check out Mind Institute Qatar, they are experts in dealing with kids 0-18 yrs old. wide range of services offered.
check out their websites to get an idea....
May Allah do the best for you and your child...
You are right. the child only needs love and attention from parents to let him forget his grandparents
iat7b: I can understand your concern and frustrations. This is because I had faced a similar situation many years back with my daughter who was around the same age as your child.
There are many reasons why your child has come to this situation. First of all, he had developed a close affinity with his grandparents and misses them much due to their love, affection and attention he got from them. When my wife came here, my daughter missed my sister-in-law very much to whom she was closely attached. We faced a similar situation as you are in now. But then, we gradually worked into her mind by taking her out on a regular basis, buying her toys from time to time and also her favourite meal which was KFC Nuggets. She began to realize that we too could give her more. In her little mind she gradually began to weigh things and ultimately forgot the sister-in-law. What your child needs as of now is an atmosphere of love and understanding from his parents, that's all.
You cannot just expect school teachers to do the job of bring in the change in the child. Their interaction is just for a limited period of time and also they have other students to deal with in the class. The change in the child needs to come from the home itself. I do not believe in psychologists being able to solve such issues. The real psychologists are present right in the home
Yes, there are reasons why he does not want to go school. It happened with my daughter also. We then tried to understand the problem. We got to learn she was very slow to understand our language especially the writing part and she was way back in the subject in the class due to this. Both my wife and I took up the job of gradually educating her at home. She picked up the subject within several weeks, and the school-going problem became a thing of the past.
My suggestion to you is to get hold of a tutor who would not just be a teacher but also become his friend. This person if he knows how to handle children, will gradually win him over on his side. The young man would begin to like him much then and open up to him. Your child will change, and you will begin to see it visible. It is not necessary for the tutor to be a female or a westerner. Just look around and you will come across one even from your own country. But just don't pick anyone who is interested in just the money.
If you need any further guidance or assistance, PM me your contact details and I will assist you as best as I can. Remember: Don't give up. It is not a hopeless case as I realize from your post.