One more... switch the island for Qatar?

They'd been stranded on the island now for over two years. Three shipwrecked sailors who had been lucky to survive and had made the best of the natural resources they'd found. But now it was becoming obvious that there was no possible hope of rescue. Doomed to a lonely, monotonous existence, they sat on the beach and stared out to sea. Suddenly there was a glint in the water - yes - definitely something shining, bouncing on the waves. Yes, there it was, a bottle. Yes, a bottle. Maybe there was a message in it it was certainly corked.

Quickly, Angus the Scot snatched it up and pulled out the cork.

There was a huge puff of smoke and out curled a genie.

'Thank you, master. You have released me from an evil curse. And to reward you I shall grant each of you a wish. What will they be?'

'Well,' said Angus, 'I'd like ten million pounds, a country estate in Scotland and a beautiful wife.'

'It shall be done,' said the genie and Angus disappeared to be re-sited in Scotland.

'As for me,' said Quentin, 'I'd also like ten million pounds, but my estate would be in lovely Hampshire with my darling Dorothy there to love me.'

'It shall be done,' said the genie again, and off went the Englishman.

'And what about you?' said the spirit to Murphy. 'What is your wish?'

'Well,' said the Kerryman, 'I don't want money or land. I'm lonely and need company. I wish the two lads were back here!'

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A wise young crackpot knows no fear - Ian Dury.