Maybe the MC would appreciate! Very funny (sorry for language but not funny any other way)...

An octopus walks into a bar and says, 'I can play ANY instrument you like.'

The Englishman gives him a guitar which the octopus plays better than Hendrix.

The Irishman gives him a piano which he plays better than Elton.

The Scotsman throws him a set of bagpipes. The octopus fumbles about for a couple of minutes and the Scotsman says, 'What's wrong, can ye no play it?'

The octopus says, 'Play it? I'm gonna f*** her brains out once I get her pyjamas off!'

^>*^>*^>*^>*^>*^>*^>*

If you never did, you should. These things are fun, and fun is good. - Dr Seuss