What else do I have to do to keep the LOVE stayed forever

How sweet

Nothin much...........

After reading & reviewing all of the folks advise here in QL, i spent my time less worrying about my hub, instead i just do normal things to do like cooking after work....watching movies by myself and when my hub comes home the only words i could speak out is "Dinner is ready" help your self...

Silence works!! now he begun bothered where am I & what Im doing...

I started to share some story to him that Ive met a gentleman at site & kinda cute or even saying i have a secret admirer at work... Hahahha I saw his face blushing & starring at me so deep!

Guys (QL Users) thank you for constant sharing and giving me advise....theres some certain things that i dont have to elaborate more that its just between me & my hub...But, so far, what i share is really help me to release my tension and heartache!!!

More power to QL & to all of you folks!

I know what I'd do...Have you listened to the advice???

Sometimes you only hear what you want to.. if you want anything to change, you need to act differently too

 You are allowing yourself to be a doormat. Sorry.

I am overwhelmed on feedback i received from QL users when i started to post on last week the same subject...Thank you guys for all the advise. Surely, it enlighten pain i have...

To continue my wordings, I was thinking to go out & have fun with my GF's to showed my hub that i am worthy & not deserve to be dumped or treat like a doormat...But, i realize things will possibly make it worse between us.

So what i do, i suprised him by getting a 2 tickets to watch movies together, bcoz of the rush & getting right timing based on his availibility, I pick movie which i didnt expect its not his type. Right on my face, what i got is 2 words. Timing is bad his fully occupied with some occasion. 2nd,  movie I pick is worst! Men, I dont get it reallY!!!

i didn't read actually your thread...but focus mainly on your topic title.... honey keeping it forever... you have to work on it really hard, communication is the key always....tell him what you got in mind and vice versa...once you failed this main key...it would be really hard to rebuild/work on every issues....likewise, put God in the center....pray hard on your relationship  to last...

forever is everyone's dream (in relationship)...but far difficult to achieve....keep your hopes up high always, communication and prayers...  

i'm saying from my own experience...

there's a downside in every relationship...but will not discuss it here..  

[img_assist|nid=12867|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

The Bible

1 Corinthians 13. 4-8

Decision to live separate is depending on the arrangement both of you have.  Maybe you're husband is so practical so he thinks that if you live separate both of you will save the money for the near future. And now that you are with him in one roof theres a lot of adjustment that will happen and you need to expect that.

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work:

If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!

Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?

Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

The Bible

Ecclesiastes 4

About money matters... both of you are bind as one whatever you have he can have it same with him. It depends on your arrangement how both of you budget all what you have right now. Dont ever argue with the money maybe you will have patience for now but in the near future don't ever argue when money involves.

The last day he said he wanted to go to other country to start a new life!  actually on this matter that he said, pray and ask for his guidance to all the decision that you may do. Let his plan arise and not yours. Lift up to Him first and talk to your husband and whatever reasn you will understand on his side then decide wisely.

I Love You...

I love you.

You are my best friend.

Today I give myself to you in marriage.

I promise to encourage and inspire you,

to laugh with you, and to comfort you

in times of sorrow and struggle.

I promise to love you in good times and in bad,

when life seems easy and when it seems hard,

when our love is simple, and when it is an effort.

I promise to cherish you,

and to always hold you in highest regard.

These things I give to you today,

and all the days of our life.

 May God continue to guide both of you and may His spirit be with both of you. May He shower you all His wisdom today and forever. God Bless

to mariam-mar, i'm not in this situation dear. i just gave an advice to rydges hotel who happens to be in this problem. Lucky Charm

Lucky_charm, ask yourself how long you can get along like this?, why is he doing this to you? Why are you inlove to this person who seem doen't really care if you exist, and seems not serious to be married? You are obviously at each others end... think twice, wise, and nice! You are still that understanding becauseyou still don't have a kid, but if you do, then i don't think you can just let him do what he wanted you to do.

  I am sorry, but this is one way relationship baby..you need a big fluffy pillow in the next days to come... 

"There's nothing we can do to change the past, if it teaches  you a lesson profit from it then, forget it."

im sorry to hear ur story,im not know the real situation in qatar coz im not there yet,but as a person i can say this you dont deserve this situation,what is his nationality?may be their culture is like that,no offense to indian i heard they are like that,my roommate b4 in ksa have same problem as you that why she file divorce to her husband,im not saying that you do the same way but try to talk to him,ask him if your married is just a matter using each other or its a commitment for life.for us mostly man will take over all the expenses but not all are same,

 its time for you to speak out,let him heard your side,the inner you,dont just keep quite in the corner may be he think that everything is ok with you.

 try to share ur idea to him,talk to in a nice way like before going to sleep or try to make an effort during weekend,cook his favorite dish eat dinner and talk will follow,evrything will going smooth and fine.

may be misunderstanding only because u are not telling him inside of you

as what i read when you insisted to him to leave out he agree so now he will also when u will try to discuss to him

i hope it will help take care

I feel for you, this is a hard situation. Marriage is very serious and we shouldnt take it lightly but im afriad if after four years hes still the same, hes not likely to change. Working on a marriage takes two people to do it, if its only one sided than you are banging your head agaisnt a brick wall.

If i was in this situation i would discuss these issues with him and if hes not willing to work on the marraige, you can either stay in a miserable marriage or move on and find the happiness everyone deserves. Personally i would rather be single and happy than married and miserable...You are lucky that you dont have children to consider in this equation as it surely makes it harder to decide, and dont think that children will bring him closer, children put a lot of strain on the most healthy relationships and if your marriage doesnt have a solid structure  then you will be doomed and consequences will be worse...

Good luck with whatever you decide but remember you only have one chance at life, do you want to live it happily or miserably..

really u r a great woman , doing this much

Rydges.

Loving him and feeling stuck to the extent you have opted to consult QLers means you are in a bad situation and feeling split between true love and establishing a family.

From what I have noticed, you did sacrifice a lot, Also things were not discussed ahead of time and are still not discussed.

I wonder if he loves you the same way you love him.

If I were you, I will put emotions aside and think of reality and the future. The way things are going do not show good prmosing future and common things to share.

Unfortunaely, most females put extra emotions, express weakness and feel guilty for ot meeting the male's endless demands.

Getting to the bottom line. Your future is ahead of you. Look for it. You might have a bad marriage example cause you did not experience the good or reasonally acceptable marriage institute.  And to be honest, the Gulf is a bad place to judge bachelor's emotions. Usually bachelors jump into the first acceptable oportunity because of loneliness. Sorry. Truth hurts. But this is the truth.

===================================== http://www.qatarliving.com/node/58409

lucky

your last post says more than enough... I am 100% with you....

just a piece of thought... how can someone appreciate you, when you don't even appreciate yourself...this is for all...Lucky Charm

marriage is a daily job. the couple should have to work together to keep the relationship running. what is the sense of you still holding on,when it's clear that your partner wants to move on with his life without you. yeah i believed that marriage is for better or for worst but i do believed also that marriage will make you more of a person and not feel like a lower person.

it's up to you to decide, try to balance everything. if after all his shortcomings and poor treatment to you, you still can't live without him then by all means do something so he will stay with you. just prepare for the worst as he knows you love him that much as he can do anything he wants and you will still accept him. good luck... Lucky Charm

If a man is in love, he will move heaven and earth to be that person..

Either he's not bothered, or you are allowing him to take you for granted with you acceptance of his non-commitment to you.

 Why should he change?? Most people will try to get away with something if they know they can.

Stop accepting second best. If you have this much love to give, give it to someone who reciprocates it.

no answer to this question. Life had it's ups and downs and you can't keep everything in the same level everyday and night. We are trying our best to keep it that way, everyone got his/her own special way to keep it up like that depending on your partner.

You have to sacrifice a lot to keep it that way ... but don't lower yourself or lose your dignity in the name of love, there is a huge difference ...

When you do the good deeds with good people, they would appreciate it ... Do the same with mean people and they will insult you ...

The good ones will know how nice, good and friendly you are and that it's your nature to be like that and got nothing in mind when you do the people any good.

The mean ones, will think that you did that because you are weak, afraid or want something from them ... and they will abuse you ...

From what I see here, frankly ... your guy got the wrong idea about marriage. I can ask my wife for help and I'm sure that she will if she will see that I need help because we love each other.

I would never think of using her because of that, actually I'm looking for a good future for me and my family so I won't trouble any later ... Taking care of these things are the man responsibility [mandatory] but it is not the woman obligation [optional].

Today's life is really hard and it's true that it got a lot of difficulties, but sharing the expenses and everything should be between the two and upon their agreement. Are you two sharing the expenses only? What about saving money? Is he saving that for both of you or only himself? You got my point here i guess ...

If you are not ready to get married and take responsibility towards your wife and kids ... then forget it and stay single ...

Don't drag others into your own problems and make it their problems too.

------------------------------------ Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. (Gautama Buddha)

Qatarisun....No, we dont have kids yet...about sharing bills, I agree with you it comes from mutual understanding & I dont mind doing it or even pays much more than he is coz i know when people get married...you become one in all aspects. But sometimes, its hurt if u heard from your loveones counting on you for what he spent or blaming you for the money's gone away take for instant car maintenance........

Sky, i couldnt disagree from you further that when it comes to love we should follow our intellect mind & shall not take other advise....However, sometime when people are so lost, advise from someone can enlighten our minds of course that depends on which advise we will adapt...good or bad?

I did try to ask him for join account, the only answer i received is...Nothing remains from his monthly income so what else he can produce for that?! Again, i just kept quiet in one side..............

hey, giving time?; what for?

The guy does not want to sleep with his wife!

there are two possible situations

1   He does not care about her

2   He is gay

Hey!!! marriage is an institution... you have to give it all you can.. i dont know if you are a xtian, but in xtianity, thats why they say for better for worse. really give it time. life is a process... you have to be strong. if he loves you and you love him ..i dont really know !!! things will work out in the end.... i wish you the best of luck though!!!!

 i love my sweetheart also more than myself and it is the best thing ever could happen to me.

maybe you have a hard time yet but dont give up,i am sure he will miss you and find back to you.

all the best

:-)

On ne voit bien qu'avec le cœur, l'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux.

(Antoine de Saint-Exupery)

I saw the exciteness from him from the very start but sometimes u can see as well the reality that most of us here paying low that cant even accomodate our own selves to life for so, understanding is the first thing came through my mind...

I came from a broken family...so, i promise myself if i get married i will do all my best not to repeat the same family history.... I always keep the faith that things will change and good things will follow shortly. Just like when it rains, it stop and sunshine arise! I might love him more than myself??? that scared me now how to start a new life without him.....Thanks for advise

you should have knew it from the start, if he really loves you, he will be happy and excited to live with you...

you're not alone in that kind of situation. separation now is very common unlike before. be brave enough to face what's happening in your life. believe that you can stand on your own, let him go.. he's not that much of a man as i read in your story,agree??? just love yourself more...Lucky Charm

to be honest.... I don't think he really loves you as much as you love him....

on LOVE........... do not ask opinion / do not consult strangers....  QLrs might give you some cut and paste ideas..   or might give you a copy of their loved quotes.....

ASK your heart and your conscious..... follow your conscious...

work with him and find ... what is the better thing he is going to get in the new country ?    Can you both find the same in  Qatar for him ?     It looks you both are not talking about your future... both are thinking separately about future.. thats the problem.

Regarding sharing etc... open a joint account.. for both of you to spend from that account.   Later your personal accounts with automatically disappear.

LOVE can make everything possible.... all that you need is love...

actually we some kinda same situation but you see in the course of marriage, sometimes you have to think other possible reasons on such acts.

dont be narrow minded. my husband once took me out on a date like twice every 3 months.. because we dont have enough time to go out.. instead we cuddle on the couch hug each other play around with the kids or simply lie down talking and asking each others problems or concerns...

pm me

NOTHING is FOREVER! Absolutely NOTHING... specailly LOVE...

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This Too Shall Pass.....

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to get married and live separate? do you have kids? do you have common goals at least for any visible period of time? why to get married at the first place?

but about the rent,  bills and stuff... it should be on your mutual agreement... there is nothing wrong with sharing bills and other expenses as soon as mutually agreed...but you should have discussed this matter prior to pushing him to move with you...lol...

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This Too Shall Pass.....

[img_assist|nid=71431|title=magic ring|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]