child custody
BEEN LIVING AND WORKING HERE FOR ALMOST TWO YEARS. I CAME LAST YEAR WITH MY HUSBAND AND MY SON UNDER A FAMILY VISIT VISA. I FOUND A JOB SO WHEN THE VISIT VISA EXPIRED I HAD TO STAY COZ MINE WAS ALREADY TRANSFERRED UNDER THE COMPANY.PROBLEMS KEEP KICKIN IN AND OUR RELATIONSHIP WENT ROCKY LIKE ANY RELATIONSHIPS WOULD. HOWEVER, IT HAD GOTTEN WORSE AND OUT OF HAND, I'VE DECIDED TO CALL IT QUITS AND PARTWAYS. SINCE I USED TO LIVE WITH HIS FAMILY OVER HERE, MY DECISION WAS TO MOVE OUT OF THE HOUSE AND LIVE ON MY OWN. I PLANNED TAKING MY VACATION A COUPLE OF MONTHS AGO TO SETTLE THINGS LEGALLY WHEN TO MY SURPRISE, I WAS TOLD THAT THEY (MY IN-LAWS) TOOK MY SON BACK HERE IN QATAR AFTER THEIR VACATION TO THE PHILIPPINES LAST AUGUST. THEY NEVER TOLD ME ANYTHIN ABOUT THIS ISSUE EVENTHOUGH THEY KNOW MY WORK PHONE AND MY MOBILE NUMBER AS WELL. AS TO WHAT IVE BEEN TOLD, FIRST; THEY NEED A WAVER TO BE SIGNED BY ME AS A CONSENT THAT THEY'D TAKE MY SON BACK HERE. SECOND, MY SON SHOULD BE IN MY CUSTODY AND NOT THEIRS SINCE I AM THE BIOLOGICAL MOM, HE SHOULD STAY WITH ME AND NOT WITH THEM. I'VE TRIED GETTIN HELP FROM THE EMBASSY BUT THEY DIDNT GAVE ANY. SO NOW IM DESPERATE SINCE ITS ALREADY BEEN TWO MONTHS THAT I HAVEN'T SEEN A GLANCE OF MY SON, SHOULD I JUST GO TO THEIR PLACE PERSONALLY AND TAKE HIM? OR SHOULD I FILE A COMPLAINT AGAINST THEM?? WILL I BE ABLE TO GET HIS CUSTODY EVEN IF HE'S UNDER THEIR VISIT VISA? PLEASE HELP..
THANKS
Interesting the modest legal advice given was under your national laws and none under Qatari Sharia based law.
As that is the guiding precept in Qatar, all parties concerned are in Qatar and the dispute is in Qatar, that should also be under consideration.
First consideration: What is the age of the child?
Second consideration: What is the sex of the child?
Then consider Sharia law. I suspect strongly that the age and sex will fall towards the mother in custody. But that is just a well tuned instinct to such matters...
But on a personal note: WHATINHELL happened? You two apparently loved one another enough to create a life between you. That is a responsability, not a parcel of property!
My wife and I have gone hungry enough that I fell very ill during our first years of marraige. I made sure she ate more than I, as she was pregnant with our first child.
Things got a fair amount better over the years, but far from comfortable, in spite of the BS everyone hears about US people. We BARELY make rent here and we are sharing the villa with 3 couples and one westerner (I get half, he gets half of the bills. HE collects whatever from the Filipinos here). We raised two children before she went barren and they're grown. One still requires occasional support (more occasions than not). After nearly 27 years, we are still together.
So, a simple question, but first: Love and hate are the same at the end of the day. Hate is simply a response to rejection of love. Not an absence!
Was and is there now any love alive between you? Remember your RESPONSABILITY to your child! Either way!
If there is, I suggest that you both stop BSing around and ACTUALLY TALK to one another. NOT emotionally, but honestly. Not as loyal wife and supportive husband, but as equal partners. In a household, you are. You should be in charge of the house, he handles the other matters. It worked for us in the US all these years. And I had her handle the money for the house too, as I am horrible at mathmatics.
My wife can say nearly ANYTHING TO ME without offense. If it's offensive, I have to give extra consideration as to WHY she said it. The same goes with me.
Is it hard? HELL YES! EVERYTHING worth ANYTHING is hard to attain and keep. The battle to keep it going is worth the effort!
So, is it worth the effort to try to revive what you once had? Yes, it'll be tough, it'll be double-tough. Is a fine, strong family worth it?
My parents thought so when they shared a can of condensed soup between them for their daily meal. My wife and I thought so when we shared three frankfurters between us.
But what we had was WORTH protecting for ourselves and our children. The question I put before you, first disregard what was done AFTER splitting up, that was a reaction to the split.What you HAD, is it worth recovering? Trust me, from personal experience with helping a number of friends, you would be amazed...
But, as in all things human, it's your and his free choice. Just remember you will be judged by your CHOICES, not as much the results.
You have all the rights to see your child and have visitation rights. But first, talk with your husband and inlaws that you want to see and be with your child and also it is your childs right to see and be with you for sometime in a week.For that case, after you talk to them and they didnt let you see ;your child, you can go to the police, visa is not the thing a mother and child can prevent you of seeing each other coz you're the mother.If police havent done anything, go to minor courts located just beside the Alfardan showroom at Al Sadd. You can not take your child in your custody for now but you will be granted a visitation rights. Court will favor for you so long as you are a good mother. But incase, you were proven you have a boyfriend or living with someone else, you will never be given the custody. Visitation rights is always granted...Goodluck!
I'd suggest that you file a police complaint here in Doha also. The authorities would (in all probability)cancel the visit visa and send the child to the home country. Once in Philipines, like tess said, it would be easier to claim custody of your minor son as you are the mother. DO NOT go and take him - it would work against you as they can claim that you kidnapped him.
I'm not a legal expert so please check with one in Qatar before you take any action.
Child custody will take time and a court order is needed .First thing to do is file a case at the place where you live in Philippines and there will be court hearings before they can issue a child custody.You cannot get it here at the Phil embassy. As a mother you have the right for your child and not your in laws. And its been 2 months but you still haven't seen your child, hOw come? I don't know exactly the story between you and your family but I think there is something wrong somewhere.
I have replied to you on the Forum. Again, seek a lawyer. A minor child under Philippine Family Laws should be under the custody of the mother, unless the husband has valid grounds to separate you from your child. Do not sign any documents that will further aggravate the situation.
And how in the world did they manage to sneak your son from Philippines to Doha?
Goodluck.