Dumb as a Wall and Old Age

A guy starts a new job, and the boss says, “If you marry my daughter, I’ll make you a partner, give you an expense account, a Mercedes, and a million dollar annual salary.”
The guy says, “What’s wrong with her?” The boss shows him a picture, and she’s hideous.

The boss says, “It’s only fair to tell you, she’s not only ugly, she’s as dumb as a wall.”

The guy says, “I don’t care what you offer me, it ain’t worth it.”

The boss says, “I’ll give you a five million dollar salary and build you a mansion on Long Island.”

The guy accepts, figuring he can put a BAG over her head when they have sex. About a year later, the guy buys an original Van Gogh and he’s about to hang it on the wall. He climbs a ladder and yells to his wife, “Bring me a hammer.”

She mumbles, “Get the hammer. Get the hammer,” and she fetches the hammer.

The guy says, “Get me some nails.” She mumbles, “Get the nails. Get the nails,” and she gets him some nails.

The guys starts hammering a nail into the wall, he hits his thumb, and he yells, “F**K!”

She mumbles, “Get the bag. Get the bag.”

The woman turned 75 and went to the doctor for a check up. The doctor told her she needed more cardiovascular activity, and recommended that she engage in sexual activity three times a week. A bit embarrassed, she said to the doctor, “Please tell my husband.”

The doctor went out into the waiting room and told the husband that his wife needed sex three times a week.

The 80-year-old husband replied, “Which days?”

The doctor answered, “Monday, Wednesday, and Friday would be ideal.

The husband said, “I can bring her on Monday and Wednesday, but on Fridays, she’ll have to take the bus.”

I know I know, it's wrong .... but it's really funny! ~LOL