just for fun!

1) Never let your man’s mind wonder
– it’s too little to be out on its own.

2) Definition of a man with manners
– he gets out of the bath to pee.

3) What did God say after creating Adam?
- I must be able to do better than that!

4) What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
- A widow!

5) Real Men… claim to be feminist but still insist on opening doors, driving, and paying for dinner.
Most Men… claim to be feminists because they let YOU open doors, drive, and pay for dinner.

6) Men are like placemats.
- They only show up when there’s food on the table.

7) Men are like Government bonds.
- They take so long to mature.

8) Men are like handguns.
- Keep one around long enough and your gonna want to shoot it.

9) Men are like parking spots.
- The good ones are taken, and the rest are too small.

10) COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.:
Female: A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one’s girlfriend.

11) MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.:
Female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male: Call it whatever you want just as long as we end up in bed.

12) The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said,
“I’ve found a man just like father!”.
Her mother replied,
“So what do you want from me, sympathy?”

13) Man: If I could see you naked, I’d die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I’d probably die laughing.

14) OFFSPRING
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and soccer games and romances and best friends and favorite foods and secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house

15) A PHARMACIST WHO REALLY KNOWS HIS MEDICATION:

A lady walked into a pharmacy and spoke to the pharmacist. She asked, "Do you have Viagra?"

"Yes," he answered.

She asked, "Does it work?"

"Yes," he answered.

"Can you get it over the counter?" she asked.

"I can if I take two," he answered.

Have a good day! :D