Why Dogs are better than Women

Smoke - U said IT :)

fact: Dogs are loyal! ehem!

Hehe - I've had clients ask if I can house train the kids as well as the dog!!

Hi Xena, what type of trainings you are providing for dogs...How they are acting after your training…

i'd rather like a nagging dog than a nagging woman. dogs can stop when you say quiet or stop or give them treat/food. dogs are nagging bec. the might want to go poop or pee outside and when they're hungry. :)

Here's one for Rony John

Picking up a dog in the streets is easier than picking up a woman at a bar :P

My ex-husband like me was a dog trainer... and many times when he met new clients, the ladies would ask.."do you train husbands too?" :-P

i think men are more like dogs...

Women have to train them so they dont tend to be wild dogs!

Down boy.. Down!

(OOoooppps no offense to men and dogs)

After living in a damp cave, Dracula's Dog is a little hard of hearing poor thing .... :O(

Lol dracula...you understand the language?? :-D

Dog's post about humans:

Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof, Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof, Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof, Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof, Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof, Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof, Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof, Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof, Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof, Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof WoofBark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof, Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof, Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof Woof,Bark Woof,Bark,bark,baark, barrrk,bark,Bark Bark Woof 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Woof,woof,Bark!

So much of dogs......

WHY DOGS ARE BETTER THAN MEN

Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.

You never wonder whether your dog is good enough for you.

Dogs do not play games with you -- except fetch

(and they never laugh at how you throw).

Dogs are happy with any video you choose to rent, because

they know the most important thing is that you're together.

Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.

You can train a dog.

Gorgeous dogs don't know they're gorgeous.

The worst social disease you can get from dogs is fleas.

(OK. The *really* worst disease you can get from them

is rabies, but there's a vaccine for it, and you get to kill the one that gives it to you.)

Dogs understand if some of their friends cannot come inside.

Dogs think you are a culinary genius.

You can force a dog to take a bath.

Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.

Dogs aren't threatened by a woman with short hair.

Dogs aren't threatened by two women with short hair.

Dogs don't step on the imaginary brake.

Dogs do not care whether you shave your legs.

Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.

Dogs never hog the remote control, and they never

change channels when you're out of the room. WHY DOGS AND MEN ARE THE SAME

Both take up too much space on the bed.

Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaners.

Both are threatened by their own kind.

Both mark their territory.

Neither tells you what's bothering them - you have to guess.

Both tend to smell riper with age.

The smaller ones tend to be more nervous.

Both have an inordinate fascination with women's crotches.

Neither does any dishes.

Both fart shamelessly.

Neither of them notices when you get your hair cut.

Both like dominance games.

Both are suspicious of the postman.

Neither knows how to talk on the telephone.

Neither understands what you see in cats.

WHY MEN ARE BETTER THAN DOGS

Men only have two feet that track in mud.

Men can buy you presents.

Men don't have to play with every man they see when you take them around the block.

Men don't eat cat turds on the sly.

Men can open their own cans.

Men can do math stuff.

Holiday Inns accept men.

WHY DOGS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN

When a dog licks your ear it has no ulterior motive.

Dogs quite happily sit and watch the football/ cricket/ motor racing without complaining.

Dogs don't want to take you shopping.

Dogs don't say "YOU DID WHATTTT!!!".

They don't expect you to change a tyre for them.

Dogs don't complain when a light bulb blows.

There's a longer time between bouts of PMS with a dog.

Dogs don't mind if you leave the seat up, in fact they prefer it.

Dogs don't mind if they don't get flowers.

Dogs don't get suspicious if they DO get flowers.

Dogs don't invite their mothers over to stay.

Dogs don't like cats.

There is no incorrect wash cycle for a dog's clothes.

Dogs don't make remarks about your mates and their habits.

Dogs bite the Avon lady.

A dog's already have a fur coat and Greenpeace don't mind.

Dogs don't care what you say to other drivers.

Dogs will defend you if you say too much to other drivers.

A dog doesn't care if you talk to your neighbour's

wife/ daughter over the fence. WHY DOGS AND WOMEN ARE THE SAME

Neither open the bonnet and check anything from one year to the next.

Both ignore "Wet Paint" signs.

Both do silent little farts and then look at you.

Both leave their scent wherever they go.

Both sniff you for any strange scents.

Neither understands cash flow.

Neither can paint.

Neither will change a fuse.

Both shed their hair all over the house.

Neither will wash or polish the car.

Both try to look cute until you take them home permanently..

WHY WOMEN ARE BETTER THAN DOGS

Women rarely pee on your car's wheels.

Women can cook. (and do the washing and ironing)

Women don't normally drag their butt along the ground whilst you're talking to friends.

Women generally smell better.

Women don't step on your crotch quite so frequently (thank goodness).

Women don't dig holes in your new lawn.

Women rarely hump your leg in public.

Women don't chew on your shoes.

Women are allowed in most restaurants.

Women can let themselves out when they need a pee at 2am.

ikr, disgusting, i really don't like dogs anyway.

thru which all the germs are transferred to skin...

Those are some REALLY weird dogs you know, especially the one that said dogs have a sense of humour? :S and then the lady who said dogs mean it when they kiss you :S

dogs are like that cause they can't think like we can... smh, sad

If it was a joke, i've never heard it before..It's nice and refreshing...

nice ones Xena

Thanks Xena...Trying to catch up what I missed :-)

and welcome back:-) You missed tonnes of sports;-P

Hahaha....good ones Xena :-)

Some are the same, but some are new:-)

Dogs always think you're smart and don't make fun of your shortcomings

Dogs are willing to sleep on a rug and fetch on command

Dogs spend less time worrying about hair loss

Old buddies don't show up on doorstep unexpectedly

Dogs are utterly disinterested in professional sports

Your parents find them easier to like

Dogs are rarely jealous of your former boyfriends

Dogs are willing to hold your purse in public

Unlikely to roll over and lose consciousness immediately following intense play

Dogs don't complain when you want to go for a walk

Dogs are willing to eat anything you put on their plate and will always want more

Dogs tend to bath themselves daily, men must be encouraged to do so

You can put a dog in a crate when you don't feel like having it around

Dogs expect to go outside on leashes... men think they can do everything on their own

Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.

Dogs miss you when you're gone.

You never wonder whether your dog is good enough for you.

Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong.

Dogs don't brag about whom they have slept with.

Dogs don't criticize your friends.

Dogs admit when they're jealous.

Dogs are very direct about wanting to go out.

Dogs do not play games with you -- except fetch (and they never laugh at how you throw).

Dogs are happy with any video you choose to rent, because they know the most important thing is that you're together.

Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.

You can train a dog.

Dogs are easy to buy for.

Dogs are good with kids.

Dogs are already in touch with their inner puppies.

You are never suspicious of your dog's dreams.

Gorgeous dogs don't know they're gorgeous.

The worst social disease you can get from dogs is fleas.

(OK. The *really* worst disease you can get from them is rabies, but there's a vaccine for it, and you get to kill the one that gives it to you.)

Dogs understand what NO means.

Dogs don't need therapy to undo their bad socialization.

Dogs don't make a practice of killing their own species.

Dogs understand if some of their friends cannot come inside.

Dogs do not read at the table.

You can house train a dog.

You can force a dog to take a bath.

Dogs don't correct your stories.

Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.

Dogs aren't threatened by a woman with short hair.

Dogs aren't threatened by two women with short hair.

Dogs don't mind if you do all the driving.

Dogs love to dance

Dogs don't step on the imaginary brake.

Dogs admit it when they're lost.

Dogs don't weigh down your purse with their stuff.

Dogs look at your eyes.

Dogs like your size.

Dogs do not care whether you shave your legs.

Dogs take care of their own needs.

Dogs are color blind.

Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.

Dogs mean it when they kiss you.

Dogs are nice to your relatives.

Dogs obsess about you as much as you obsess about them.

Dogs don't care how you dress.

lol Xena...good one !!

Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.

Dogs miss you when you're gone.

You never wonder whether your dog is good enough for you.

Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong.

Dogs don't brag about whom they have slept with.

Dogs don't criticize your friends.

Dogs admit when they're jealous.

Dogs do not play games with you -- except fetch (and then never laugh at how you throw).

Dogs are happy with any video you choose to rent, because they know the most important thing is that you're together.

Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.

You can train a dog.

Dogs are already in touch with their inner puppies.

You are never suspicious of your dog's dreams.

Gorgeous dogs don't know they're gorgeous.

The worst social disease you can get from dogs is fleas. (OK, the *really* worst disease you can get from them is rabies, but there's a vaccine for it, and you get to kill the one that gives it to you.)

Dogs understand what "no" means.

Dogs don't need therapy to undo their bad socialization.

Dogs don't make a practice of killing their own species.

Dogs understand if some of their friends cannot come inside.

Dogs think you are a culinary genius.

You can house train a dog.

You can force a dog to take a bath.

Dogs don't correct your stories.

Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.

Dogs aren't threatened by a woman with short hair.

Dogs aren't threatened by two women with short hair.

Dogs don't mind if you do all the driving.

Dogs don't step on the imaginary brake.

Dogs admit it when they're lost.

Dogs don't weigh down your purse with their stuff.

Dogs do not care whether you shave your legs.

Dogs take care of their own needs.

Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.

Dogs mean it when they kiss you.

Dogs are nice to your relatives.

And this is why I prefer my dogs to men... and the main reason I am still single;-P

Can you do it "Woman Style" ?

Where are you from....???

West or East ??

MIlan_R, i already read this before but still worth a laugh everytime i read it. :))

Quoted :"Why are you even on QL ...this is human lounge and we do not appreciate pets and dogs here!!!"

LOL Black Magic.. I love my dog.. What made u think that QLers do not appreciate pets and dogs? Maybe you don't like pets but do not implicate others (QLers) cause I'm sure more than half of QL population love their pets..

A first-grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students.

Teacher: What is your problem?

Boy: I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is. I think I should be in the third-grade too.

The teacher took the boy to the principal's office. While the Boy waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was.

The principal told her that he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.

She agreed.

The boy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: What is 3 x 3?

Boy: 9

Principal: What is 6 x 6?

Boy: 36

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should know. "I think the boy can go to the third-grade", said the principal. The teacher said she had some of her own questions to ask. The principal and the boy agreed.

Teacher: What is it that a cow has four and I have only two?

Boy: (after a moment) Legs.

Teacher: What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?

Boy: Pockets.

Teacher: What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?

Boy: Coconut.

Teacher : What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?

The principal's eyes openned really wide and before he could stop the

answer, the boy was already answering.

Boy: Bubblegum

Teacher: What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?

The principal's eyes openned really wide and before he could stop the answer...

Boy: Shake hands.

Teacher: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?

Boy: Yep.

Teacher: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.

Boy: Tent

Teacher: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first.

The Principal was looking restless, a bit tense and took one large vodka peg.....

Boy: Wedding Ring.

Teacher: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me,you feel good.

Boy: Nose

Teacher: I am a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.

Boy: Arrow

Teacher: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' that means lot of heat and excitement?

Boy: Firetruck.

Teacher: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' and if u dont get it u have to use your hand?

Boy: Fork.

Teacher : What is it that all men have one. It is longer for some men than for others. The pope doesn't use his. Normally a man gives it to his wife after they're married?

Boy: SURNAME.

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher, "Send this Boy to the University. I got the last ten questions wrong myself!

have made the life of some women so regretfull!!!

Coz you see women and talk about women in this way which makes other men feel the same....

Only animals love and make love with animals...

If you love your DOG so much...then you are 1 of the kind !!

Why are you even on QL ...this is human lounge and we do not appreciate pets and dogs here!!!

As every women knows MEN are D**s ...they like to be out on the street and try to look for new trash outside everyday...!

if we prefer dogs over women we may have the following:-

1-rabis

2-human dog hybrids (hudog)

and lots more

visper.....they might be jelous B'caz of your (dummy) pic

Dogs Never get angry if you come midnight

we cant perform orals with dogs they will chew off ur.........

Visper.... YOU'RE CUTEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! lol

dog makes dog's style on the street...

So someone can yell at me because i'm cute? :D

Yeah you're right! Dog are less barker than WOMAN tooooo!

visper coz ur so cute :P

visper ur so cute :P

Why are you yelling at me?

VISPER........DONT BE JEALOUS.....COOL DOWN

YUKKKKKKKK

we can't have $#x with dogs

i expected more brick bats .... LOL

just to divert the QL regional bashing :)

Men are Like dogs and Men are better than Women... :) i mean dogs are better then women !!! :))

Mens are Like dogs and Mens are better thn Women... :) i mean dogs are better then women !!! :))

Dogs have a sense of humor.

(Visper) GOOD ONE:):)

Marry your dog then..

lol... dogs eat s h 1 t..

Mwahahahaha