Just curious..

buttercupryle
By buttercupryle

Good afternoon guys!!!

Since this is a Moslem country I want to ask something from qatari women here in Ql..

How do you feel if your husband will decide to take a second wife? Do they still ask for your permission? and what if you don't want them to marry another girl, is it ok? Is there a competiton for love and attention?

By buttercupryle• 5 Dec 2007 11:09
buttercupryle

Thank you for your answers guys..

我听见 我忘记; 我看见 我记住; 我做 我了解。

You can't understand until you walk a mile in someone else's shoes.

By anonymous• 5 Dec 2007 08:39
Rating: 4/5
anonymous

I think that PM is right; the responsibilities that come with it are great. Also, during the time of Prophet (and many other similar situations), hundreds of men used to die in wars which created a great imbalance between the number of men and women in a city. Additional marriages just made sure that no women had to live their lives alone if they didn't want to.

Now a days I don't think that it is necessary and most Muslims aren't opting for it either.

By anonymous• 5 Dec 2007 06:48
anonymous

My wife said OK go ahead. so I am working on that now:)

By jassKat• 5 Dec 2007 05:31
jassKat

I know! When I told my husband everything I was putting in, he laughed and said he wouldn't expect anything less :D

tra la la

By diamond• 5 Dec 2007 05:21
diamond

Oh yeah, Jasskat, pre-nups rule! Girl power :)_______________________________________________________

Love is the answer...

By jassKat• 5 Dec 2007 04:06
Rating: 4/5
jassKat

Like you, my marriage contract is full of stipulations and requirements. Having only one wife, me, is one of them.

Although I know my husband would never want another wife (too much work :D) I put it in. Better safe than sorry.

tra la la

By diamond• 5 Dec 2007 04:02
Rating: 5/5
diamond

Well, I think I am eminently qualified to answer your curiousity Buttercupryle...

When two people agree to marry here in Qatar under Islamic Law there is a marriage contract. It is very akin to a pre-nuptial agreement. In it is stated what the husband is gifting the wife. It is a requirement of the contract that the husband must gift his future partner items of value such as money, jewellery, property, clothes, etc. The husband must also agree to be the financial provider for the family and that any money the wife earns is hers to do with as she pleases. The bride is not required to give her groom anything at any point.

Then the two parties write in any stipulations of the marriage. Usually the bride will write. It is not common for the groom to write anything. This is where the bride writes in things like 'I will be the only wife'. 'I reserve the right to work outside the home'. 'I reserve the right to travel independently of my husband for business or pleasure'. 'I wish to stay in my own home independently of my in-laws'. You can write whatever you want. 'I reserve the right to fly to Europe for shopping three times a year'. Only joking on that one but you get my drift. This will have been discussed in advance and agreed upon.

Also written in is the consequence of the husband breaking any of the agreements written down. This will be an agreed minimum financial and property settlement which will increase as the husband gains assets during the marriage.

To answer your question, most women write in that they wish to be the only wife (who wouldn't?).

My marriage contract is full of my requirements :) My husband often jokes that he couldn't afford to divorce me!!!

Seriously, obviously it is better to have discussed all this beforehand before entering the marriage like in any other country. But it is imperative to have it in black and white as a legal binding document.

_______________________________________________________

Love is the answer...

By Vegas• 5 Dec 2007 01:37
Vegas

Think hard Buttercup...

Please...

You can't teach experience...

By buttercupryle• 29 Nov 2007 08:25
buttercupryle

Jeffy,

let me think of that...

lol

我听见 我忘记; 我看见 我记住; 我做 我了解。

You can't understand until you walk a mile in someone else's shoes.

By buttercupryle• 29 Nov 2007 08:25
buttercupryle

I thought she will give in to her husband's wish easily...

;)

我听见 我忘记; 我看见 我记住; 我做 我了解。

You can't understand until you walk a mile in someone else's shoes.

By Vegas• 28 Nov 2007 22:49
Vegas

Buttercup...

Why don't youget a second husband???

You can't teach experience...

By dragonfly212• 28 Nov 2007 22:27
Rating: 2/5
dragonfly212

there is a woman she feel that lately the husband treat her really nice and sweet at all time. and this time the husband take her to airport so she can go to mecca for haj, come back from haj, she feel that the husband acting more sweet and very loving. until one day, the husband ask for serius talk.

Husband: My lovely wife, can I marry again to another woman?

Wife: (Shock and very sad hear this news (hide the emotion)) she only smile to him and said of course!!!! but i have 3 wishes from you.

Husband: Whats your wishes dear...

Wife: 1st you have to love her as much as you love me

Husband: Thats very easy, considered it done!

Husband: Whats your 2nd wish? (they husband is very happy so far with the wife response).

Wife: I want you to be more religius and practise all the muslim law.

Husband: Oh my dear, that I can guaranty I will do.

Husband: Whats your 3rd wish my dear wife? (this time the husband is very happy and have a big smug on his face)

Wife: OVER MY DEAD BODY!!!!

THE END.

he he he he

By buttercupryle• 28 Nov 2007 15:21
buttercupryle

for me its not muti-tasking..you know it's hard and very much painful for a woman, knowing that his husband is making love to another woman right?what more is seeing them together with the second wife's kids...

我听见 我忘记; 我看见 我记住; 我做 我了解。

You can't understand until you walk a mile in someone else's shoes.

By anonymous• 28 Nov 2007 14:11
anonymous

It is called Multi Tasking. I don't mind doing that:)

By nouf84• 28 Nov 2007 14:04
Rating: 4/5
nouf84

its not that common anymore for qatari men to take a second wife - especially the younger generations i mean and from what i've seen the younger people usually have an understanding that if he wants to take a second wife, if she gives her blessing then its cool - otherwise he divorces her so she has other options too

personally, i wud go with the latter option too

but then again i wudnt give my husband a reason to want another wife ;)

lol

on a serious note tho, if that is case, coz like with everything else in life.. things fall apart... people fall apart... and if we're not working out... then i'd rather he told me to my face that i no longer give him wat he needs in a wife... and i will ask him to divorce me.. so we can both seek the happiness we're missing elsewhere..and not have to deal with cheating.. or marrying behind my back..

neither one of us needs to hurt the other

we're all human

we all have needs

we all deserve to fulfill them and be happy

cheers

"He who reigns within himself and rules passions, desires, and fears is more than a king."

By buttercupryle• 28 Nov 2007 13:54
buttercupryle

ok let me hear your answer...我听见 我忘记; 我看见 我记住; 我做 我了解。

You can't understand until you walk a mile in someone else's shoes.

By _chelsea_• 28 Nov 2007 13:24
Rating: 5/5
_chelsea_

Do you want the answer for Qatari females only? Im not a Qatari woman but I'm a Muslim...

By buttercupryle• 28 Nov 2007 12:41
buttercupryle

Thanks swissgirl.

I'm really curious about this..

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我听见 我忘记; 我看见 我记住; 我做 我了解。

You can't understand until you walk a mile in someone else's shoes.

By swissgirl39• 28 Nov 2007 12:37
Rating: 5/5
swissgirl39

good question.will keep an eye on the posts here.

have a good afternoon you too.

*Create your own destiny,fighting against your dark sides,raise your

spirituality.Every day is a new day.A new life.

Keep the faith!*

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