License to chat
My husband just told me that it is ok for me to chat or communicate
about my personal life to an opposite sex. My translation to this is he is giving me
a license to have emotional support from another man and he promise not go get
upset.
What do you say guys is this in my favour?
Go ahead ICU.... emotions are virtual in cyberspace anyway.
Hey , this is a free world, speak to and gain advice from as many individuals as you can, just because you listen to there advice, does not mean you have to act on it, i would rather listen to 1000's of peoples experiances, then make up my own mind, as life goes on, i think you appriciate this more, at the end of the day, apart from getting dark, if you can look in the mirror and say you think you done everythin rite, then good on you......but if you look in the mirror and regret somthing that you have done, so be it, the important thing is LEARNING from it, and not to repeat it........wow, what am i talking about!!! haha, smile and b happy.,
yeah...me thinks he is just checking to see ur reaction....
mebbe he cinfided in a work colleague or an ex?!!?!!
but honeslty...how wud u feel if he confided in someone of the opposite sex?
When someone says they've been given permission. With Snowy on this one never have never will tell my partner who they can and can't talk/confide in, same goes form him to me. I have male friends that i flirt with even when he's there same goes for him (female of course). The fact is we know our boundries and we know our relationship. By him giving you permission has me thinking that he has already confided in someone of the opposite sex and instead of being honest with you about it he wants you to do the same so he doesn't feel guilty.
Don't forget the "KIASU" factor in Singaporeans blood :(
Dear ICU,
I warn you see my posting all men are .......
Hope dear lipstick also remember my words....
One Can't be Born Tough but Be a Grown Tough
Sounds like a really boring job ...... "have we got key number 13344557 logged?" .... "yes" ...... "have we got key number 13344558 logged?" .... "yes" ....... have we got key number 13344559 logged?" ...."no" .... "WHAT ?!?!?!" ...... "just messing with you; yes, we've got it logged" ........ "you're such a kidder, mental you are .... eh? ... eh?"
"The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets"
cannot comment on his bahviour. am just turning my lower lip down.
but keep in mind that there are key loggers
===================================== http://www.qatarliving.com/node/58409
.... your husband is a very insecure man, ICU. He has obviously convinced himself there is something going on and so, in order to prove that he is right, he is trying to engineer the situation where something will actually happen.
I believe it's called a self-fulfiling prophecy.
Dear ICU,
Check my first line above....
Hello everyone
Thank you all for your comments. Yes, I started to contact my old male friend last night. It is a trap!!!!!! His action was telling me he was upset but yet still saying it is ok. He then said to me that I should use my common sense and I should know what is good and what is not in my marriage. So why push me and why say things he doesn’t mean.
take your husband at his word..and don't go looking for trouble or ulterior motives. Most men who are SECURE in their marriage won't mind you speaking with other people..male or female.
I do have to wonder about you saying he GAVE you permission to talk to other men tho...do you always have to ask permission to speak to others???
To those naysayers who say it will lead to other things...think again...we all need someone to talk to other than our spouses..and yes,your spouse can be and usually are our best friends..but sometimes you just need someone to let loose with all your frustrations..sometimes ABOUT your spouse..and want the opposite sex's opinion as to whether or not you are being irrational or normal.
yes, he MIGHT be checking up on you as to who or what you are talking about...so let him...if you are not doing anything wrong or out of line..then don't worry..in fact, introduce them sometime.....
BUT...bottom line on this is...please be careful of who you entrust your personal life to on line...you never know just who you are actually speaking to...where they work, or WHO they work with...or if they are fruitcakes or not...
Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
--Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865)
he might have his own agenda ......
Why do u need emotional support from another man
other than your husband ???
I am not possessive
Just call me Tigasin. That's what I'm talking about
One Can't be Born Tough but Be a Grown Tough
ICU, your husband is broad-minded.
not all mr. bala------
All men are alike in their possessiveness ……………….. No matter, whether they belong to USA, UK, Mid East, or Asia…… be careful …..Do not get in to trap…
One Can't be Born Tough but Be a Grown Tough
Ducks is right. Thank God your husband trust you that much.
Stay REAL
Cool.....and thanks for the explaination of Silly....etc
I may be blonde but I am wise
smile lots laugh more
I was refering to the Original Poster because some Sillyporeans have weird ideas like Anabell Chan creating a world record for......................(ask original poster) :(
think of even saying that to my wife, talking to another man? Don't know but being a husband is more than providing for the family or paying the expenses. If that is the case, women would marry bank accounts instead ...
Your woman is looking for your support, your love, understanding her emotionally, knowing how do she feels ... but asking her to talk to someone else?
Is he looking for a reason to do something in the near future? maybe soon? Got no idea as i'm not in his head but ... won't be ever happy with my wife seeking those things from another man while i'm supposed to be the one providing that ... If I can't, then there is really a problem and love may not be there anymore ...
just being honest here nothing more ...
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. (Gautama Buddha)
charansoi11r......hmmm to whom's husband were you referring to
I may be blonde but I am wise
smile lots laugh more
ICU...getting someone to talk to on issues is an advantage to give you a different perspective. but why online? do you have other friends? anyways, as for all issues the best persons to discussed with are those involved --- in this case your husband. with this license to chat i hope you dont get emotionally involved...
I think I've discovered the secret of life you just hang around until you get used to it. ~Charles Schulz
No wonder your husband was born in Sillypore :(
Okayyyy...think I am missing something here. I haven't asked permission to talk to a male friend about personal issues nor has my husband asked me for permission to talk to a female friend. We just do it. It's sometimes good to get another's opinion, esp of the opposite sex. He doesn't fear anything from this and nor do I...........
Is there more to this that what you're saying?
I may be blonde but I am wise
smile lots laugh more
ICU,
once you get married, you are promising each other that there is no one else in your lives more important than each other. So why do you need another man to share your imotions with?? some men can take advantage of females who get very imotional with them...
so what your husband did....doesn't sound so great... there is something behind all this or Otherwise,
Share your imotions with each other... be it anything...hey after all you don't want someone else to know what you feel about your husband...right?? so..it works both ways...
Some very good points were made here. I do believe you can become close online with a member of the opposite sex and it can lead to more than just friendship - afterall it happens all of the time. Please be careful about sharing emotional situations and issues - especially via private messages because as you share with each other and sympathize with each other, you will become closer and an attraction beyond friendship could develop.
Finally - I would be suspect of your husband being so willing to allow you to enter into a relationship like this. Trust is one thing but he, in my opinion, is throwing you into temptation. The question I would have is why.
What a strange illusion it is to suppose that beauty is goodness.
~Tolstoy~
I think ur hubby is for barter system... keep an eye on him..........
hey just kidding
as paul said take it positive....i guess he loves you so much and wants you to be happy.....
ICU, take it in a positive way.
?????
That one was a slip of the fingers ....
All things being equal, fat people use more soap
i am not so sure about that after reading some last thread! mila, i completely agree with you!!!
I was going to say something mean, or flippant, or both, but even an insensitive brute like me knows when to keep one's yap shut
Mabruk on getting your licence, ICU .... enjoy !
All things being equal, fat people use more soap
Congratulations BUT. Cannot comment on this without having an idea about the background and history.
Anyhow, as our naughty friend - Mila - said. Boundaries is the key point
===================================== http://www.qatarliving.com/node/58409
If your husband wants to change himself for you, thers nothing better than that, do not suspect him, just use your freedom in a better way and always make him feel that he is special and above all to you...
Good Luck
Pure Love...
shehan check whats new with him how he dress these days. and most importent check whos he chatting with may be hes giving you freedom in return of expecting the same
may be u r under observation by him
Live and let live...
I can only think of two reasons:
1. He completely trusts you and he wants to get the same from you.
2. He wouldn't want you to question him if you found out he was doing the same.
Like ducks said, as long as it doesn't go further than just chat then there's nothing to worry about. But being careful wouldn't hurt.
“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”
- G. House
what does ur pic at the signature say..? u r burning or hot?
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good for you enjoy
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Why not.....why should we not have friends ,male or female.....someone we can talk to....my wife and i did...she would back me up now.....unfortunateley she died....but we had good relationship 30years....and no probs.....aslong as your opposite friend....is a friend....and not have ulterior motive....take care....
use the trust wisely but always remember your boundary.
Everybody is right Everybody is wrong, it depend where we stand.
In my opinion, he's up with two ideas. One is to check the mode of the opportunity when given how you use it. Socond, he would let you make your self buzy in sharing thoughts with opposite sex when he's having same or more relation with someone. Or else...
I wish man should only say what they mean and mean whay they say.,
Shehandis, what do you think he is up to?
Once they discussed the subject on Dr. Phil and they said you would be having an emotional affair that could lead to physical by going outside your marriage. He said its like you would be denying your partner if you share with others as through communication and sharing we develop a relationship, thus you would be stalling your relationship with your husband.
It goes both ways
in your favor, i don't think so,, he will be upset if u got attached emotionly more than it should to another man, he might not say so, but really he will be, specially that ur going to communicate personal issues, ur husband is a man after all.
He's after something be careful
well...that should be your right anyway, doesn't it? I mean, if you are in a relationship, you have to trust each other. So as long as it stays at chatting, it doesn't really matter if it's to a guy or a lady...
Doha, I'm coming! Ducks in Doha from 12th - 18th of May :)