A man has six children...

I don't know from where do you get this stuff, .. Couple of nice jokes ... Very long and funny surveys .. I guess that we all should have a meeting with you when you reach here ... looking forward for that.

Good Stuff Mayfield !! :)

LOL

whats this.

Great did laugh a bit at it :P

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An old woman walked into a bank and asked for the manager. He took her into a small room, and asked him if she could take out a loan of $500.000. He asked her how she was ever gonna pay it back.

"I make bets," she answered slyly.

"What?" replied the manager.

"I make bets with people, and win their money. Take this for example: I'll bet you $25,000 that your balls are square."

"You're on," said the Bank Manager, feeling quietly confident.

The next day granny and her accountant came by the bank and went to see the bank manager.

"Now then," she said, "to make this fair, I have brought along my accountant. Now pull your trousers down."

"OK, anything for 25 grand..." he said

"I'll just get a wee feel now, to make sure."

While granny was doing this, the accountant began to bang his head on the wall.

"HAHA!!! They're round!" cried a delighted bank manager. "By the way, what's wrong with your accountant?"

"I bet him $500,000 that I'd have the bank manager by the balls on Friday morning!"

A woman goes to an ice cream parlor and asks for a chocolate ice cream cone. The clerk apologizes and says that they are out of chocolate and asks her if she'd like to choose a different flavor.

The customer says, "Sure, just give me chocolate, please."

The clerk again apologizes, and thinking that the woman didn't hear him, says, "I'm sorry, we don't have any chocolate left. Is there another flavor that I can get for you?"

The woman says, "Well I guess I'll have chocolate."

The clerk, extremely pissed now, tells the woman, "Spell VAN as in vanilla."

The woman spells out, "V-A-N."

"Now," says the clerk, "spell STRAW as in strawberry."

The woman spells out, "S-T-R-A-W."

"Okay," says the clerk, "Now spell F**K as in Chocolate."

The woman looks dumbfounded for a moment and proclaims, "Wait - there's no 'F**K' in 'chocolate!'"

And the Clerk replies, "That's what I've been trying to tell you!"

A woman is in bed with her lover, who also happens to be her husband's best friend.

They make love for hours and, afterwards, while they're just lying there, the phone rings. Since it is the woman's house, she picks up the receiver. The best friend listens, only hearing her side of the conversation:

"Hello? Oh, hi.... I'm so glad that you called.... Really? That's wonderful.... Well, I'm happy to hear you're having such a great time.... Oh, that sounds terrific.... Thanks. Okay. Bye bye."

She hangs up the telephone and her lover asks, "Who was that?"

"Oh" she replies, "That was my husband telling me all about the wonderful time he's having on his fishing trip with you."

A couple had been married for many years, and their son had gotten old enough to date. One day the boy brought a girl over to dinner. The mother was thrilled with her son's choice and couldn't wait for the wedding. However, the father was upset and, eventually, the boy asked, “Dad, why don't you seem happy with her. Mom likes her a lot.”

The father explained, “No son, there's nothing wrong with the girl. It's just that I cheated on your mother a long time ago, and the girl you've been dating is my daughter by that woman.”

So the boy dumped her and found himself another girl. Again, he brought her home to the mother's delight, but the father again told him this girl was actually his half-sister. The boy lost his temper and told his mother what his father had said.

Furious, the mother shouted, “Don't listen to him, sweetheart! He isn't even your father!”