When do you say enough is enough?

jinkz
By jinkz

When two people love each other so much but somehow they seem to argue a lot, when do you say enough is enough?

 

I always learn the hard way but now I can say "Never"

 

 

Oh this is good, someone say something about this quote:

 

"Marriages don't fail because couples get bored. They fail because, while they're dating, people pretend to be the person they think their partner wants and then - well, there's only so long you can keep that up."

By azilana7037• 6 Apr 2008 20:22
azilana7037

very nearly there....

 

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" -Eleonor Roosevelt 

By anonymous• 6 Apr 2008 19:43
anonymous

Mate u r fed up

By tatess• 6 Apr 2008 18:17
tatess

when you both are not happy with each other .

By wmhizon• 6 Apr 2008 17:34
Rating: 3/5
wmhizon

 

lose love but dont lose respect with each other...

 

 

"Even if  LOVE is full of thorns, embrace it. For in between those thorns there is a ROSE that's worth all the PAIN."

By Masters• 6 Apr 2008 16:54
Rating: 5/5
Masters

when you feel there is no more bit of love in your heart. but as long as there is love in your heart , you cant say enough is enough.

 

for friendship >  Q A T A R E X . C O M

By Mom_me• 6 Apr 2008 16:51
Mom_me

The relationship equation changes with time. It cannot remain consistent with time and as relationship matures one should focus on the warmth which comes from stability of relationship. Romantisizing a realtionship is disillusioning yourself.

By jinkz• 6 Apr 2008 13:40
jinkz

Thank you!

 

People don't change, we try, but there's only so much we can try to change, the real us, will always come out before we even notice.

"People thinking their partner will change? That's another reason marriages fail."

 

Ergo, when two people love one another and they feel they are meant for each other, it should never be Enough!

 

But then again third party is still out of the question...at least for me. Hmm, am I going against my own words here...nah I don't think so.

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By Tigasin321• 6 Apr 2008 13:30
Rating: 4/5
Tigasin321

You are absolutely right. One of the few advantages of getting older is that you tend to accept yourself as you are and the side you show to the outside is closer to the person you really are on the inside. When younger it is tempting to try and reinvent yourself and to show that reinvention to those you are trying to attract. But you cannot keep it up.

Most of us think that we are unlovable as we really are and we try to show a different person that is deserving of love. Fact is, we all deserve love no matter how flawed we are. But to get it, you gotta learn how to give it! 

A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her. Oscar Wilde

By jinkz• 6 Apr 2008 13:20
Rating: 4/5
jinkz

"Marriages don't fail because couples get bored. They fail because, while they're dating, people pretend to be the person they think their partner wants and then - well, there's only so long you can keep that up."

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By jinkz• 6 Apr 2008 13:13
jinkz

ref your signature, for the short period that i've known you...i don't think you mean that

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By dragonfly212• 6 Apr 2008 11:00
Rating: 3/5
dragonfly212

it depent the situation lipstick. sometime we need to be right and sometime we need to be happier.

Everybody is right Everybody is wrong, it depend where we stand.

By lipstick• 6 Apr 2008 10:59
lipstick

what is better, to be happy or to be right?

-life is short, so i guess id go for "to be happy"

By jinkz• 6 Apr 2008 10:46
jinkz

I'll do it if you promise to look after me on friday

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By Tigasin321• 6 Apr 2008 10:40
Tigasin321

PS Read my signature. Never a truer word said in jest. 

 

A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her. Oscar Wilde

By jinkz• 6 Apr 2008 10:40
jinkz

i'd like to think that I am a wise level headed person ... i'm not so sure anymore hence this topic

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By Tigasin321• 6 Apr 2008 10:39
Rating: 3/5
Tigasin321

Enough of all this wet relationship stuff. The important question is have you made the JT cd for me yet? Plus I need you to do a few others.  

 

A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her. Oscar Wilde

By wmhizon• 6 Apr 2008 10:35
Rating: 5/5
wmhizon

 

for me marriage is sacred... as long as u can save & keep the marriage do it specially if u have children.

 

Now if u really did all ur best to keep the marriage but nothing seems to work & theres no LOVE at all... 

I guess the best way is to let each other go than let ur children sees all ur arguements everyday. As much as possible keep the friendship & open ur communications to him / her even only for the sake of ur children.

 

Who knows by giving each other enough time & space... Time will come & u will see each other again realizing in the end that "he/ she still the one for u".

 

 

 

 

"Even if  LOVE is full of thorns, embrace it. For in between those thorns there is a ROSE that's worth all the PAIN."

By Oryx• 6 Apr 2008 10:33
Oryx

sorry jinx.... it was meant to be what folk say in a relationship not you!

you sound like a wise level headed person.....I like what you say.

By jinkz• 6 Apr 2008 10:30
jinkz

I said that 3 months ago? Aww, is my memory failing again?

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By jinkz• 6 Apr 2008 10:28
Rating: 2/5
jinkz

Aww that's so sweet

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By Oryx• 6 Apr 2008 10:27
Rating: 3/5
Oryx

U right - Patience is very important....

and yes don't rehash..... 'remember what you said 3 months ago......'

don't dwell on the past make the present harmonious to pave the way for a good future.

By thexonic• 6 Apr 2008 10:21
Rating: 4/5
thexonic

Enough is Enough... there i said it. lol It's never enough for me.

 

--------------------

"Be Like a Flower, Which gives off it's fragrance

even to the hand that crushes it.

By dragonfly212• 6 Apr 2008 10:19
Rating: 5/5
dragonfly212

you will learn by time that enough is enough. this one time when you think your heart and happiness and you are worth more then the words can say, you will say to your self thats it.. enough. i will not let anybody walk all over me or take me for granted. good luck jinkz with ever your decision.. remember we here for you.

Everybody is right Everybody is wrong, it depend where we stand.

By shane23• 6 Apr 2008 10:16
shane23

i always telling this... if you are not happy with him anymore better to let it go

By tinkerbelle• 6 Apr 2008 01:08
Rating: 3/5
tinkerbelle

i know exactly what you mean about the small arguments turning into complete craziness.  It happens too often here at my house in my opinion, but at least we have opinions.  That's what I always tell myself when others tell me they never disagree. That's a tough question, but i think you are invested just as i am.  from your comments i think you're in it for the long haul. good luck to you.... just sounds a little familiar 

By azilana7037• 6 Apr 2008 00:26
Rating: 4/5
azilana7037

I was just replying to your post/topic...about the years and stuff.

Then i continued by sort of rehashing of the things i could have done better back when...

I'm just being in the nostalgic mood tonight...about ME (and someone else)...of the things i should/could have done but never did...nothing to do with you.

I apologize for the confusion/miscommunication...

 

 

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" -Eleonor Roosevelt 

By jinkz• 6 Apr 2008 00:18
Rating: 3/5
jinkz

oh and yeah I know he's a nice guy way before you mentioned it

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By jinkz• 6 Apr 2008 00:16
jinkz

ok ms azi, stop right there before i get annoyed again... don't try to be a smarty and think you know me goody better than i do ok  

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By azilana7037• 6 Apr 2008 00:10
azilana7037

Just be open to "him"....he's really a nice guy.

try this: if in ANY CASE you want to discuss any subject with him...

- watch his mood.

-DON'T start it when he just came from work

-or you guys are on your way to/about to take dinner.

-NEVER rehash what happened a few hours ago...let it slide for a day or two...then be PATIENT with him. tell the story as calmly as you can. We ladies tend to get hyper as we tell the story ourselves...

- Don't start if with a "WHY DID YOU...or HOW COME?...or to that effect; it would only put him in the defensive.

I'm not being the MS. GOODY GOOD SHOES here...let's just say, I did/said some stupid things...that i wished I never did.

 

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" -Eleonor Roosevelt 

By jauntie• 6 Apr 2008 00:03
jauntie

Are we talking about finding it difficult to agree on what colour to paint the bedroom walls, or which suite of furniture to buy? A tiff over how an egg should be cooked?

Or are you speaking of major differences to do with politics, religion or whether to start a family and those type of emotive subjects.

Cos if it's just about where to put the living room chair, or who sets the alarm clock for what time,  then I think that's normal sort of squabbling when you live with ANYONE!

The very word ARGUE sounds harsh in itself.   A 'tiff' or 'hissy fit' is something else! lol

 

By fieryangelinthesky• 5 Apr 2008 23:54
fieryangelinthesky

When there is anymore no room for compromise in your relationship and you're both not happy... that's the time to say enough is enough. 

By QT• 5 Apr 2008 23:54
QT

I was hoping one would get wiser with the number of relationships, but not the case for me!   I guess, I'll just have to see if the years make a difference instead!  

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 23:52
jinkz

I'm afraid it would take me a lot more years before I learn...I hope not

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By azilana7037• 5 Apr 2008 23:51
Rating: 2/5
azilana7037

All relationships have ups and downs...it's how you ride the tide, dear.

I still remember the relationship i had with my ex-BF (he's Scottish). Since we have different cultures and beliefs...we disagree on many things.

What I usually do is let him rave and rant...I listen and take his point. Once he cools down, we discuss what he said and what i think. I give my suggestions and we discuss it.

I was 36 then, he was in his 50's...13 years gap and he always said I have lots to learn and he has a lot to teach me...but who said he can't learn from me? 

It might be different with the younger generations, because they're impulsive, sometimes emotions get the better of them.

How do/would i know? I've been in several relationships myself...we tend to be wiser as the years pass.

 

 

 

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" -Eleonor Roosevelt 

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 23:30
jinkz

Oh my goodness...I hope my relationship now is not doomed to fail...i mean not again ... sigh

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By QT• 5 Apr 2008 23:15
QT

I envy you, you've obviously reached a stage in your life I'm still searching for!   (Sigh)

 

Congrats!

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 23:11
Rating: 2/5
jinkz

I am right most of the time and it's great ...but then lately I realized I was never wrong anymore so I started thinking...hmmm, something is not right.

 

So yeah, I decided to be less stubborn before my beau ends up asking the question up there himself.

 

 

 

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By QT• 5 Apr 2008 23:10
QT

To be happy or to be right, that is the question.

yep, no chance of both!   LOL

By QT• 5 Apr 2008 23:07
QT

?????????

 

Now, that's a whole new thread!!!

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 23:06
jinkz

so is one year of arguing enough? bcoz talking about my past relationships that was the max for me!

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By QT• 5 Apr 2008 23:04
Rating: 3/5
QT

Trust me.  After being in a relationship for 5 years and then trying to reconcile for 3 more years, you soon realise when enough is enough.

...wait till you get to my age!  You youngsters, bah! 

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 23:03
jinkz

really? that's not how it works??? damn it! 

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 23:00
Rating: 3/5
jinkz

but it's tiring and exhausting getting to know someone new, so it's better to settle things and tell your current partner what you love and what you hate about him/her and hope for him/her to changefor the better. I mean clearly, ifhe loves me, he would do whatever it takes to make me happy, and of course I'd do the same for him.

 

btw, 28 is not young for me

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By QT• 5 Apr 2008 22:49
QT

You're obviously still young so you question how much is enough.  Trust me, after taking so much bull**** for years, you'll soon see that the size of "how much is enough" seems to shrink with time!

By nadt• 5 Apr 2008 22:42
Rating: 4/5
nadt

Jinx i agree that patience is a virtue in relationships and we shouldnt give up easily, which is why i said depends how long. For example if the relationship has been hard for years and years and you are still arguing over major issues, personally its enough for me, as both parties have to learn to compromise if they truly love and want to be with each other. However if its only been a little while, of course you have to try and make it work and not give up easily.

By tinkerbelle• 5 Apr 2008 22:40
tinkerbelle

that would be the straw that broke.....

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 22:37
Rating: 4/5
jinkz

I have been in so many relationships in the past and I never had the patience to wait for change, so I always end up saying "enough" but I've realized it takes patience to make a relationship stronger. I agree with you, life outside is hard enough as it is, it would be nice to come home and be with the one person you love waiting for you to be in his arms to make your day better.

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By tinkerbelle• 5 Apr 2008 22:36
Rating: 4/5
tinkerbelle

I have lost trust in people, but I still love them.  I would not be honest with myself if I did not forgive.  I expect forgiveness and understanding, and likewise I do the same. Trust comes in all shapes and sizes.  Love in one!     Unconditional Love Is An Oddity  (and often misunderstood)     

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 22:30
Rating: 4/5
jinkz

I totally agree.

 

As long as there is no third party involved, it's never enough for me. I could deal with almost anything but not cheating.

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 22:27
jinkz

and sometimes it gets really frustrating that it scares me that that could be the end. It is always scary to lose the one you love, someone you have invested so much love on.

 

have you ever felt so frustrated that you were arguing about something which started from something really small and then it escalates without both of you noticing it that you forget what you were arguing about to begin with?

 

i'm really lucky and thankful that my beau is the most understanding person in the world as i could be really difficult.

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By nadt• 5 Apr 2008 22:24
Rating: 5/5
nadt

It depends on what you are arguing about and how long have these arguments have being going on.. If they are issues that arsie from day to day stuff, then thats normal, life would be boring if you always agree or one person always bows down to the other.

However if they are major issues and you cant see eye to eye on those important stuff, and they have been going on for ages, then i would say "enough". Love is not enough to sustain a healthy relationship...This will only depress both parties and cause long term resentment...

Life is hard enough having to deal with the challenges life throws at you, do you really want to go home to more destructive challenges or would you rather have home/partner as your safe haven..

By tinkerbelle• 5 Apr 2008 22:15
Rating: 4/5
tinkerbelle

with the trust and love.  VERY well put.    And Azilana, I only wish I could be as level headed as you.  I am way too stubborn.  The making up is all that much sweeter for him though!!!  My beau probably likes my ridiculous tantrums. LOL

By ERMA KHAN• 5 Apr 2008 22:03
ERMA KHAN

never never never to be taken for granted. tht is the time to say enuf is enuf!

By Oryx• 5 Apr 2008 21:27
Oryx

when you have the same arguments again and again and again and there is no resolution.

obviously it is better just to sit down and talk to someone in a compassionate caring supportive way and explain your concerns and see how they can resolved.

I hate arguing :( with someone i love.

but worse that that is silence.

By britexpat• 5 Apr 2008 20:27
Rating: 2/5
britexpat

If it gets you down, then its not worth the aggravation. Beter to have peace and tranquility.

By Snowstorm• 5 Apr 2008 19:50
Rating: 2/5
Snowstorm

 

YOU DONT KNOW ME, DONT EVEN TRY !!!

[img_assist|nid=92055|title=BE HAPPY|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By alain_arts• 5 Apr 2008 19:44
alain_arts

it would be like hell for me...arguments now and then. 

 

***** I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. ******

By lipstick• 5 Apr 2008 19:37
lipstick

not for me alain_arts

By alain_arts• 5 Apr 2008 19:29
alain_arts

when trust is lost....

 

love follows... 

 

***** I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. ******

By lipstick• 5 Apr 2008 19:22
lipstick

when trust is lost-big arguements.

 

when love is lost-enough  is enough.

 

By saheri• 5 Apr 2008 19:11
saheri

we can say "ek medaan mein doe talwar ne reh sakti"so thats why people argue

By lovinni• 5 Apr 2008 18:59
Rating: 5/5
lovinni

jinkz...just a little heads up maybe the man has some serious issues that he keeps it to himself which caused his sour moods...i mean he rants on other things rather than facing the issue....just maybe

I think I've discovered the secret of life - you just hang around until you get used to it.  ~Charles Schulz

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 18:55
Rating: 2/5
jinkz

Yeah arguing about the same thing over and over again is never a good sign so compromise, make it a win-win thing

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By shane23• 5 Apr 2008 18:52
Rating: 2/5
shane23

if you are always arguing the same thing... better to settle it or else it will be the cause of your break up

By azilana7037• 5 Apr 2008 18:45
Rating: 3/5
azilana7037

 to that "making up" part...

 

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" -Eleonor Roosevelt 

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 18:43
jinkz

just about anything...things in general...but yeah I agree with you.....

whoa did I just say I agree with you??? now there's something I never thought I'd say ... but yeah, I do agree on what you just said up there.

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By alain_arts• 5 Apr 2008 18:43
alain_arts

..a battle of wits from dusk till dawn, at the end....

I surrender....I need some sleep b4 work. 

 

 

***** I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. ******

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 18:40
Rating: 3/5
jinkz

...arguing is not all that bad I agree...and not to mention the making up part

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By azilana7037• 5 Apr 2008 18:38
Rating: 5/5
azilana7037

My opinion/view about it...One should remain cool or back out until the other cools down. If both are emotional/tensed, they may say things they might regret in the end.

Still we go down to the baseline....COMPROMISE/COMMUNICATION.

Tell him why you're upset, what you think/feel about it and what you want to happen. If he doesn't agree, let him explain why. if you still don't agree...well, COMPROMISE.

 

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" -Eleonor Roosevelt 

By swissgirl39• 5 Apr 2008 18:35
Rating: 4/5
swissgirl39

but me i love to argue,so its most of time the other which is giving up.

;-D

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 18:32
Rating: 3/5
jinkz

No not Blood, all of us have that I meant the romantic person in you...that not everybody has ~lol

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By DaRuDe• 5 Apr 2008 18:29
DaRuDe

 

had me what what you mean blood??

 

[img_assist|nid=73057|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By jassKat• 5 Apr 2008 18:23
Rating: 4/5
jassKat

 

well at leas tthere is some passion there, just learn to transfer it into a more positive activity!

 

tra la la

By jinkz• 5 Apr 2008 18:21
Rating: 4/5
jinkz

Aww Da, I didn't know you had it in you

 

“They say you can't live without love. Tell them oxygen is more important!.”

- G. House 

By Mom_me• 5 Apr 2008 18:19
Rating: 4/5
Mom_me

If arguing is leading to some positive decision and diffrent prespectives than it is worth arguing because I feel it would be quite boring if two people agree on everything. But if it is argument for the sake of annoying and is dampening your spirits you really need to give it a serious thought.

By DaRuDe• 5 Apr 2008 18:16
DaRuDe

 

the last drop of blood drops out of your body or dries in your body

 

[img_assist|nid=73057|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By sentibhim• 5 Apr 2008 18:14
Rating: 2/5
sentibhim

Saadi ka laddu khawoga vi pachhutawogi,Nahi Khawogavi pachhutawogi.lol

"Drink Beer Save Water"

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