worried mum

Manoaila
By Manoaila

i'm one year post-partum and moving to qatar because my hubby has a new job there. I'm just going through awful post-natal blues. Am really worried that I'm going to be isolated. Always been in UK. Last two years in Canada. Do not cope well in hot weather! Very worried!

By Manoaila• 15 Apr 2007 07:01
Manoaila

Thanks to all that repiled...think I will stop in UK for a wee while longer...perhaps do some retail therapy for baby n I

By pwb78• 13 Apr 2007 19:38
Rating: 5/5
pwb78

I think you can be as busy with mom/baby activities as you want. Coffee mornings, play groups, swim lessons, gymnastics days... You have to look at what's going to make you more upset - being at home and missing your husband or being in a new place with your husband and your family being together. It's tough to leave the support system that extended family offers but you can find friends here. There are doctors here that can help you as well. You never know, a new place may offer a fresh start. Send me a private message if you want to see the latest issue of Mums the Word newsletter. Best wishes.

By diamond• 13 Apr 2007 16:38
diamond

hi han19...different experience for everyone living in Qatar but it is what you make it...I read all negative comments prior to mine so was trying to present a more positive comment! plenty of friendly local women out there with the right effort made (no offence Scorpio...don't bite back ha ha!!!)

By han19• 13 Apr 2007 16:07
han19

hi girls how you doing today?

well i think the point a little bit lost over here.

manoaila is having the postnatal blues......so in such a case is it the wise thing for her to relocate to a complteley drastically different place from her hometown. different cultures.

i love doha....and i too feel this is the right place to be........but at this point of time i dont think its the right place for her. every individual is different and so adaptation differs for everyone. it may be easy for her or may be terrible for her. knowing the little she has mentioned....i feel it might just be terrible.

what do you think?

happy heart

drive safe because someone is waiting for you at home

By Scorpio• 13 Apr 2007 13:52
Scorpio

From day one I've been interested in meeting the locals, they don't seem interested in meeting me.

By diamond• 13 Apr 2007 13:38
diamond

sorry if that was a generalisation but It's my own experience of the majority of expats that I have come across...don't know a word of Arabic, not interested to get to know locals, etc. maybe you are different

By Scorpio• 13 Apr 2007 13:33
Scorpio

When I first arrived with my newborn, I was depressed and miserable for quite awhile. This place shocked the hell out of me.

Maybe visit the country first and speak to people online from Doha to get some perspective and don't rush into anything like I did. Hope it works out for you :)

diamondgirl, that is crap re expats "don't bother", where did you get this from?

By diamond• 13 Apr 2007 13:23
Rating: 5/5
diamond

on the other hand there are plenty of women and baby groups who will welcome newcomers...the heat is easy to cope with because of ACs everywhere...often in the summer I feel cold in malls...but things do tend to slow down for western expats in the summer as many people leave for a few months vacation. If you send me your e-mail address via a private message I'll send you an e-mail magazine especially for mommies and young children which is packed with playgroup contacts, tips on what to do here, etc. Then you can subscribe and receive it every month. Qatar is a great place to be. It's very laid back and relaxed and not as restrictive as you may have been led to believe. Remember you're moving to a different country and culture. Get to know some locals and start to learn the language. That will open up a whole new world for you. Most expats don't bother to do this and just want to live within their own culture here. That's so boring!!! Wecome to Qatar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

By cygnet_chay• 13 Apr 2007 10:44
Rating: 5/5
cygnet_chay

I agree with all of them, it's really different here in Qatar compared to U.K me and my husband go back to U.K every summer for six months and im always looking forward for that, we've been here in Qatar for almost four years now but still we dont like it very much, it's hard to find friends and theres not a lot of places to go not like in U.K ur family and friends are just a few houses away if you wanted to talk to someone u can just go to ur friends or family's house and have a chat. When im here in Qatar im a totally different person "Boring person" but when im in U.K i am myself! so in ur case you better stay in U.K then just come here later on when everything is settled and when ur all better, i know exactly what ur feeling right now and Qatar is not the best place for you, Yet....

By han19• 13 Apr 2007 10:21
Rating: 5/5
han19

dont come here yet.

get better and when you are mentally ready for a move, then come here.

this place is a drastic change from uk or canada and if you already have the PPD, the relocation and loneliness will only aggravate matters.

my sincere advice would be to be happy with your baby with your immediate family around you to care for you.

let you hubby settle here first and make the gradual shift to this place.

if you are not ready to adjust to a different and completely opposite culture then it can get real stiffling for you.

the last thing you need in your present state is to be alone with a young baby...so stay back home and come later.

what you could do is drop here for a short vacation after your hubby is here so you get a feel for the place and you can gauge for yourself if you are ready to make the transition. its upto you...so take slowly.....your health and the baby's wellbeing is more important than anything else right now.

take care my dear.

happy heart

drive safe because someone is waiting for you at home

By finlyn• 13 Apr 2007 09:39
Rating: 5/5
finlyn

I been through the same as you been through now! So i understand complately about your feelings.

If i were you! I stay in UK bec. u know the places you have friends ,family to be there with you...and goin with your husband is not the answer of your depression....My husband also travels a lot but better off with out us..

anyway you can visit him or join him later and let him settle down there and if you think you can manage yourself and feeling much better then you can be with him again....and before you join him in Qatar you have to know that you cant do like you want to do in UK.UK is a free country you can do almost anything but Qatar is a totally diff.Culture and u have to respect that as well....so i believe that you get more depress when you jopin your husband in qatar....so better you stay were you are now and get better your slef.first.before facing another problem...take care and you get over it very soon.

By butterfly• 13 Apr 2007 06:44
Rating: 5/5
butterfly

in your shoes, I would stay in UK and join your husband only after a few months. Let him settle before into his job and life in Doha whilst you have your family support back home. You can always join him in October when the weather is starting to cool down and hopefully by then, if you are being treated and looked after, your depression will be a thing of the past and you'll be ready for the challenge of moving to Qatar.

I wish you the best.

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