your old flame pops up again.. but..

I agree with those who say, woman is looking for security, emotional, financial, etc. But this girl got already engaged with other man. It means this man has met her requirements in terms of security. But when she knew that security of her 'old flame' could be higher, she changed her mind.

And since we are also talking about emotional security, 4 years ago our guy could give much more stable emotional security to the girl than now. As at that time he was truly in love with her, and all he wanted in his life was her. She ignored this emotional security. Now this area isn't safe at all, as obviously too many girls are after that now-a-rich guy lately, it is hard to talk about any type of emotional security now.

Areta_NZ, i didn't say all 4 years she was engaged to other man. I said, that during these 4 years she has met another guy, got engaged and eventually broke up.

test the waters, see if you have chemistry now. since you're a lot tougher now, like you said, don't fall for her easily. study her first. is she for real or just for show? give it a couple of months or more, then decide if you will get serious with her or not.

you're a successful bloke man. this is a walk in the park for you.

I'm a girl. If I do something like that, I'm sure I love your money only.. plus 4 years engagement is too long, don't you think? at least 2 years to make it believable.. lolz.

Lol painther, I will not divulge my secret in QL.

jpa, I think it's Money which is the biggest aphrodisiac.. than comes power, affiliation....my view!!

even if it's not a real story, there are plenty such stories around, it's a common scenerio i think in relationships.....

I cannot answer the question of the OP as I have never been dumped by a woman. But I believe that "power is the best aphrodisiac".

osamabawab, it is a real story.

I used "imagine", just to let you feel in this guy's shoes.

Why control the thoughts...I say replace them with newer ones to think of....:)

But thoughts are tyrants that return again and again to torment us

Tinker, how well do you know these men? See, there is a saying..."Same circus, different clown"....;)

TB, i never confront a girl (my policy..lol)..so I'll leave my other male friends to respond, if any1 feel otherwise.

to me, he asked suggestion, I gave to the best of my understanding (free of charge )..thats all !!

..as far discussions on human relations, male-female ones, for last thousands of years its on....and will be on.....

carry on !!

You are into business today and rising. What about when you suffer seatback in business and down again ? She will definitely not continue with you.. she will look for a better deal again. So I don't think it will be wise to marry her but you can just be a friend nothing more than that.

Flan we are still waiting for the pics mate! say when are you going to upload them?

Girlz, first, it;s directly been asked by "guyz", u know why? because girlz will inject their EQ (emotional quotient) into this.

second, it's the guy who has to decide if has love (hidden/left/new generation) for his old love......

..and in love we forget many thingz....really many!!!

..my opinion/guess-this guy, if he ever sincerely loved that girl, will go to her, else he never had loved her seriously..

..and last..love is not a matter of trade whwre we see who benefit what.....!!!! who sacrifices what!!!!....who lost what!!!!!!

...Plz refer-- some1 gave up throne of britain (was a big deal in that era) for his love......!

Mr.M, our points of view may be based on our respective cultures.

Tinker, wishful thinking. In theory, yes, that is perfect. But in reality, it don't work that way. It is usually up to one to make more effort than the other. At least initially.

give her one for old times sake.

My suggestion (as the OP asked) will be:

Mate, if you still love that woman (just ask honestly urself)..then go get her. Revenge, tit for tat etc are are generally bad things and destroy simplicity (beauty) of life....

If you don't love her, simply avoid her....

..

"make it simple"

tinker, a women who is stable single and happy doesnt come in our discussion at all..

some women who are already married and more financially stable than their counterparts dont come in our discussion as well.

i never said anything about our country...i was referring to the west and in turn implied the rest of the countries in the east, far east and middle-east.

Nomerci i disagree,in fact one would feel that men nowadays after they graduate and start earning,they would eventually plan to get married.And most girls when approached would not rather refuse and stay single and frustrated,but they would accept the proposal,of course with certain strict criteria.Again there are girls as well as guys who love playing around.

I quite liked "We give up happiness for being RIGHT"...

tinker, it was never different. Finding the man one is compatible with has never been easy. The difference now is, that splitting up is easier than it was before.

Also a lot of people are not ready to make certain sacrifices. We give up happiness for being RIGHT.

I think the OP is not about what a women should or would want....but rather what a man do with the woman who intends to get into relationships based on money..the one who seems to be in the habit of re-defining her definition of 'secure future'... accept her or dump her...:)

On a serious note,yes a woman will be more concerned about the emotional aspect and rather than financial needs nowadays.

rishimba, rest assured, even in the West women look at the financial side. The difference to other places may be that in the West most women have the freedom to not only look at the financial side.

Tinker let me be your Prince Charming and sweep you off your feet,yet again! ;)

oryx, what you said is applicable to women who are educated and already secure..probably, in the west your analysis is more befitting than mine.

but here i go with nomercy...:)

Tink, the only person to give you emotional security is yourself.

And as Oryx said, Prince charming is nothing more than a dangerous myth. Dangerous because girls want and wait for him.

Delusion...yes, a massive part of a woman's life when it comes to men. This is what divorces are born of.

I think a woman must look for a balanced package (lol), character, stability and last but not least, physical attraction.

which is a bit of a myth along with prince charming!

its amazing what us girls will put up with/delude our selves with when we think we are getting that

guilty as charged i am ashamed to say

I know quite a few women who a living proof to the contrary of what you have said....

they very much provide the economic security of the relationship-personally i think they are as mad as a bag of frogs!

I do not need to be with anyone for economic security but wouldn't provide 100% finance in the relationship either.

I actually think some women want the emotional security

and I bet she's lebanese!

Thing is, even the greatest love does not fill an empty stomach.

tinker, u have the right to your opinion....

no, i dont talk from personal experience, one can never have a big enough sampling size to come to a conclusion in the general sense.

i was more before i got married

now i am less...

it happens to both end of the world. you're never alone.

regarding the girl, not worth even a single penny.

its the same story everywhere..no women will ever marry a man who cannot give her social and economic security even if she likes him as a friend.

what a women wants is a secure future with a happy and loving family.

a women loves a man because of the above reasons apart from his looks and not because how much the man loves her.

lets understand reality..

agree with eliashamzo.

ive a friend who married the girl like this one in similar situation and now after 10 years of marriage and 2 kids he says he has made biggest mistake of his life.

now he realises that since she (in this case the girl said i want to explore that is there someone better than you)came back to him (since nobody gave a s...t to her)he shouldve said NO

The answer is simple.. give her one and drive away in your epaensive car :O)

black.....exploid the situation....explode it to its max...and forget........her

yes Sally, this is what i said in the beginning "we can't judge unless we listen from both sides"

Let us give her the benefit of the doubt.

A man gives many question marks, however, a woman is a whole mystery. ~Diana Stürm

is this a real story? coz u said in the beginning "imagine" so i thought it is just a drama

thanks guys, that's what i also thought..

and guess what.. as soon as this now-a-rich guy showed her his affection again, the first thing she asked for was "some little cash, and the amount is up to you, sweetheart"..

what do you think of it?

Take my advice ..

Pick a lady that will stand next to you no matter what situation you are in .. a lady loves you for what you are and not for what you own .

And This lady no matter what true feelings she might hold or even you might hold for her .. she had her chance and lost it ...

Dump her like she did ,...

i hate those type of people.. who will only be there when they need you. be with someone who can't live without you..for richer or poorer.

good luck to you. may you find the love of your life.

Switch off the pop up blocker. Allow download old flame this time only.

Yeah looks like she likes the better deal... ;)

1. She dumps you

2. She dumps your friend

Yes... she is in love.... in love with money...

Lol Shapil ... "prostitute who accepts gifts in kind..."

we can't judge unless we hear from both sides.

apparently, she may break-up with him again if he lost his business in the future.

but also there is a chance that she wants that guy from the beginning but she preferred to go for more secure relationship and when the first guy is ready she came back to him.

such cuties are nothing but a prostitute who accepts gifts in kind....the others in her brethren who accept cash are better than her.

Earlier she agreed only to be a friend not anything 'more' (your words), obviously you wanted something 'more'... now seems you can have that 'more'...go for it and dump her...she is in the habit of dumping people.... yesterday it was you, today its someone else, tomorrow it will again be you when someone offers her a better deal. 'Love'... nah, I wouldnt think of that.

As a girl,I don't agree! She is clearly only after his new found money! She isn't worthy of him,in my opinion,and he should find a girl who loves him for who he is,not for his money. True love will overcome pretty much anything,including poverty.

been there... done that.