But you know what the problem is? Other people put up the standards for me that'y why only two brave men dared and asked for my hand in marriage. But you know what? They couldn't wait and sought happiness in the arms of other women. What to do?

If only they know how simple my heart's desires are. :(

It's very rare for a man to catch my eye and rare as it may seem, most of the time, I put up a wall and extinguish my feelings to give way for my family's welfare. I always felt that being the eldest, it is my responsibility to help my parents help my siblings. I have also vowed to myself, that I would get married only when the time comes that all my siblings are okay because I don't want to share my trouble with my future husband. I have long been hoping that once I have secured the future of my siblings and their families, I could retreat into a very simple but happy family life with only my husband and at my age, if we would still be blessed with a child - that will definitely complete me. Most of the time, though, because I have already reached this age still single, I would also question myself if dreaming for a family life of my own is still worth it?

I believe that this is one of the rare moments that a man was able to pass through my defence. But this will definitely not be a rare moment for me to once again control my emotions.

Like I said in the poem I wrote during my vulnerable moment which FS found in one of my posts..."Be still, my heart, be still..."

Thank you all for the reminders...thank you for the advice...thank you for the time you gave to this forum.

I am feeling a lot better now and once again in control of my errant emotions...:)